MasterMind

Chapter 18

"Just hold still for a bit longer," the healer said.
Atathum watched as the white bandage wrapped around his arm, turning red as soon as it touched the wound. Luminara sat close behind. The healer grabbed another bandage, quickly wrapped that one around the other bandage, and pinned it closed.
"There, mister Duskrider," the healer said, brushing her hands against her apron.
Atathum moved his arm down, and he stood up from the chair he was sitting in.
"Thank you," Atathum said, bowing while holding his arm.
The healer bowed in return.
Luminara stood beside Atathum as they walked out of the med bay and to the ship. R-0B1 was there.
"Hello, Master Luminara," The droid greeted, but hesitated before he said, "Hello, Master Duskrider."
Atathum leaped over the rim and into the back seat. Luminara jumped into the front seat, and R-0B1 drove off. Atathum looked down at his boots the whole time.
"Master Luminara, what made Atathum...you know..." R-0B1 asked.
"An evil emotion," she replied.
Atathum fidgeted with the loose part of the bandage, trying to take his mind off the other day. The children, the masters, the helpless, the insecure, the dreamers, the hopeful.
The hopeful.
Now, all without hope, since they are all dead.
All of them.
A tear slid down Atathum's cheek. He looked up to see his master and R-0B1 looking at him. He wiped the tear away and looked to the side. Coruscant was busy, as usual.
"I don't think he's taking it too well, Mis," R-0B1 pointed out.
"Yeah, I noticed," Luminara replied, annoyed.
The ship slowed to a stop by the dorms. R-0B1 turned the ship off, jumped out, and connected the ship to a cable. Luminara jumped out of the ship and turned around.
"You need help?" Luminara asked.
Atathum shook his head. Luminara walked in. Atathum sat in the ship, frustrated with himself. He made a stupid deal with Gül, alowed him into his head, and killed a bunch of people. It will probably be known now as the "Duskrider Massacre," or the "Massacre of the 300," or something like that.
Tears streamed his face, and there was nothing he could've done to stop it.
"Master Duskrider," R-0B1 said.
Atathum looked up at the droid.
"Is something wrong?"
Atathum sighed, "No, nothing's wrong 0B1."
"I certainly think there is."
"I'm fine."
"Sir, if you are crying, I believe that is not an okay matter."
"It's not a big deal."
"Well, maybe Luminara can tell me." R-0B1 headed for the door.
"0B1! Wait!" Atathum called.
R-0B1 turned around and walked back.
"Yes, sir?" he asked.
"Promise me, that you won't tell my master."
"Master Atathum, I am a droid; we always keep promises."
"Usually keep promises."
"Okay, usually keep promises."
"Okay, I'll tell you..."
"I mean, if you don't want to tell me, you don't have to."
"I don't want to, but it'll just make me feel worse if I don't do anything about it."
"Okay, sir."
"By the way, you can stop calling me 'sir' and 'master.'"
"It's in my nature to say that. Anyways, what were you going to say?"
"I can't stop thinking of yesterday."
"I believe you, and droids have great memories, so we would probably remember that for a--"
"You're not helping."
"Sorry. Continue."
"Lots of the stuff I did was...non-Jedi-like...and it's stuck in my head. I don't know if I should tell my master or my friends."
"I suggest you tell Yoda."
"Yoda!?"
"He's the Grand Master, he would probably understand what you are going through."
"Did Yoda ever murder 300 Jedi?"
"Well..."
"You're telling me Yoda murdered 300 Jedi?"
"No..."
"Exactly."
"I was just saying that he can help you out. He could be kind of like your councillor."
"You're saying I need a therapist?"
"OH MY GOSH, ATATHUM, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY!!"
"Geez, 0B1."
"Sorry, mas--Atathum. Think I blew a fuse."
"You think?!"
Atathum wasn't really sad anymore, and he was more laughing --without the laughter--at R-0B1 than frustrated. R-0B1 seemed to be smiling--since he was more organic than not--. Atathum stood up from his seat, used the Force, and jumped onto the landing. R-0B1 turned to face him.
"Gee, if I could only jump like that," R-0B1 admired.
"You have to have a midichlorian count," Atathum replied.
"Is it possible to program that?"
"In your dreams, 0B1."
"That's unfortunate. Imagine how amazing the Jedi would be with me, R-0B1, Jedi Knight!"
"They would confuse you with Obi-Wan."
"Than just call me R-0."
"That doesn't really sound nice."
"Hey, at least you wouldn't confuse me with that Obi-Wan."
"Good point."
The door slid open to Luminara standing by the holographic table.
"Yes, he's back to normal." Luminara said to the hologram.
"Good. Anakin hasn't been himself since, and he keeps asking me if there was an easier way of knowing than just waiting," Obi-Wan's voice came from the hologram.
"Master?" Atathum asked.
Luminara turned around. She smiled.
"Well, it looks like he's here right now," Luminara said.
"Is that Obi-Wan?" Atathum asked, moving closer,
"It is, would you like to talk to Anakin? He's been worried about you."
"He's worried about me!?"
Luminara nodded. He practically shoved her out of the way and stood in front of the hologram. Luminara chuckled.
"Hello, Atathum," Obi-Wan greeted, "Anakin's coming."
"Good. I didn't mean to make him worry, please tell me he knows that!"
"I'm afraid not. He's been waiting for some kind of answer that you are back to yourself. He actually started meditating to sense you. I know it probably has been a day for you guys, but it's been a week for us. Anakin doesn't sleep, and just meditates day and night. Haven't seen him this focused in years!"
"Interesting."
"Master, who are you talking to?" a voice pitched in from the back, probably Anakin's.
"Come and see," Obi-Wan said.
Atathum waited to see who it was. He was right.
Anakin appeared onto the hologram.
"Anakin?" Atathum said, slightly excited.
"Atathum!" Anakin exclaimed, rushing closer to the hologram.
"I heard you've been quite busy."
"Very."
"And sleeping very well."
"Best sleep I've had in my entire life."
The boys laughed --though Atathum's was still sarcastic, not genuine--. Atathum noticed that Obi-Wan was right about Anakin's sleeping pattern: there were dark crescents under his eyes. From the look of his face, though, Atathum wasn't the only reason why he was tired.
"Anakin, is there something else going on?" Atathum asked.
"Why do you ask?" Anakin asked.
"Well, your facial expression shows that I'm not the only reason why you are tired."
"Um..."
"If the masters leave, maybe you can tell me."
"Okay."
Atathum turned and faced his master, and a sarcastic grin. Luminara nodded and walked over to her sleeping quarters. Atathum watched as Anakin looked to the side for a while, and then back at him.
"Luminara gone?" Anakin asked.
"Yes. What's going on?" Atathum replied.
"So, I know how we are good with keeping secrets, I mean, I've kept your secret for about eleven years now, so I'm trusting you with this one."
"What is it?"
"It's about my mom."
"Shmi?! How would you know--"
"I'm dreaming."
Atathum went silent. He could see that Anakin was looking towards the ground.
"What...What kind of dreaming?" Atathum asked, hesitant.
"The kind of dreaming that makes you wake up in a sweat," Anakin replied, looking Atathum in the eye.
"I've experienced those kinds of dreams."
"What do you mean?"
"Before Gül was a physical being, he was in my dreams. I woke up with my master freaking out because I had screamed to be saved. My legs weren't working, and my head was spinning, and I was sweating. My dreams only got worse from there, at least, the only amount of time I had to sleep before Gül interrupted it."
"I always wake up right before something terrible happens to my mom."
"I don't know how that feels but I know how waking up terrified feels."
"It's a horrible feeling."
"It is."
"Sometimes, I want to scream for someone to help her, but I know that it won't work, and if Obi-Wan finds out, that won't be good for sure!"
"Yeah."
"Were you able to get over the dreams?"
"Sometimes."
"What do you mean?"
"My dreams are different sometimes. Sometimes it involves Gül or something like that, sometimes it is of my past."
"Interesting."
"It is."
"How do you handle the past dreams?"
"Not well, at least, I feel horrible. My outside appearance makes it look like I'm tired of waking up earlier, while on the inside I'm trying not to scream."
"I would say that's brutal, but I know that I'm experiencing the same thing."
"See, this is why our masters call us brothers."
"I guess so."
Atathum smiled and Anakin chuckled. Back to the way things should be.
"Yes, Duskrider, just as they should've been," Kaaf Shi said.
Atathum stopped chuckling. Anakin noticed.
"What is it?" Anakin asked.
"Auric," was all Atathum could say.
"What did he do?"
"Oh, I don't know..."
Atathum sighed.
"Maybe he decided to purge the Jedi from Coruscant, didn't succeed, but never forget the look of the children's eyes."
"I'm sorry, Atathum."
"Sorry for what? What did you do to me? I'm the one who is responsible for nearly ending the Jedi."
"What you said to me."
"I...I didn't..."
"No, Atathum, I understand. I like having people fear me, but sometimes I abuse my power. I can say whatever I want, all because I'm the Chosen One."
"You what?"
"I abuse my power. I don't want to, but I just...it's hard to explain."
"You want people to know what you can do."
"Yeah."
Anakin seemed to clench his fists. He turned his head diagonal to the right while his eyes were closed.
"Anakin? Are you alright?" Atathum asked, concerned.
Anakin didn't respond. He opened his eyes.
They were reddish.
"Atathum, I don't know what to do," Anakin said softly.
"What do you mean? You're the Chosen One," Atathum asked.
"I feel like I have to meet the standards of the Chosen One in the eyes of all of the Council, and if I mess up, I can't be the Chosen One the prophecy said I would be. I feel like the galaxy is resting on my shoulders, and if I trip, the galaxy will fall into mayhem. That's what the Council makes me think. Obi-Wan senses my stress, and because of that, he won't allow me to take the trials."
"I'm sorry, Anakin."
"No, I'm sorry. I'm just complaining to you everything that's going on in my life, even though you have better things to do."
"What things? The entire Jedi at Coruscant fears me!"
"Good point."
The boys went silent. Anakin was crying and Atathum was trying not to. Everything Anakin went through was about as bad as his past.
Though his past was a past no one could have replicated.
"Well, I hear Obi-Wan calling," Anakin said, "so, until I see you again: may the Force be with you."
"May the Force be with you," Atathum replied.
The hologram faded away. Atathum brushed his eye. Luminara walked in.
"It seems I came in just in time," Luminara said.
"You better have not listened to us," Atathum replied abruptly.
"Why?"
"It's important."
"I only came out to say that Yoda wants to see you."
"Oh."
Atathum stood up, walked over to the door, extended his arm, felt his cloak slam into his hand, throw his cloak on, walk out the door, and stood out on the waiting pad.
"Ready to go, Atathum?" R-0B1 asked.
He nodded and hopped in. R-0B1 jumped into the seat, and drove off.
"Hey, Atathum, how was talking to Anakin?" R-0B1 asked.
"It was great. Wanted to see how he was doing. Checked, and discovered some stuff that had happened while he was gone," Atathum replied.
"That's good."
The ship parked outside the steps. Atathum lept out and ran towards the doors.
"I'll be waiting here for you!" R-0B1 called.
"Okay!" Atathum yelled back, not slowing down.
The doors of the Temple opened, and he halted abruptly. He walked in as casually as possible, but he would see that everyone would look at him and turn their faces against him. He already knew what they were thinking. Someone ran into his shoulder, and didn't bother to apologize. Someone else almost tripped him. Stay calm Atathum. Remember, they didn't deserve any of this. The door to the Council's office slid open. He walked in.
The room was dark.
"Welcome, Young Duskrider," Yoda's voice came from the room.
Atathum walked in and found Yoda sitting on one of the chairs. Atathum walked until he was in front of Yoda.
"Seat, you can take," Yoda encouraged.
Atathum sat down.
"What do you need, Master?" Atathum asked.
"Your thoughts, you must tell me. Uncomfortable, this might make you, but disturbance in Force, I felt."
"Master, how do you deal with pain?"
"Mhmm, deal with pain, I have. Assure myself, I do."
"How?"
"Meditate, clear my mind."
"But Master, how can I--"
"Trust the Force, you must. Guide you, Kaaf Shi will."
Atathum nodded as Yoda continued to explain to him about leaving his fears behind him, and how fear leads to the Dark Side. They sat like that for about three hours: Yoda lecturing Atathum.
"Wasn't R-0B1 right?" Kaaf Shi said as Atathum left the room.
He was.
Atathum walked out of the corridors. R-0B1 was still waiting.
"I was starting to think you weren't coming," R-0B1 said as Atathum leapt over the side into his seat.
"Sorry about that, R-0B1," Atathum replied.
R-0B1 moved the ship to the side, and suddenly sped up in the opposite direction of the dorms. Atathum grabbed the sides of the ship in surprise.
"0B1! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Atathum screamed so he could be heard over the sound of the engine.
"I THINK YOU NEED TO EXPERIENCE A DIFFERENT TYPE OF THRILL!!" R-0B1 shouted back, having the time of his life.
Atathum looked at R-0B1. R-0B1 turned and smirked at him. Atathum smiled back and turned back towards the front. He let go of the sides. And for the first time since Gül showed up,
He laughed, genuinely.