Ashes Blow Away

Chapter Nineteen

CHAPTER NINETEEN: CLOSURE

From then on, Everly consumes every waking moment of my life - and I don't mind. I feed her, hold her, play with her, and against Aurelius's words, I sleep with her. Peeta rushes home from the bakery each day to take her off my hands and let me sleep, and I normally end up watching him with her.

It's beautiful to think that Everly is the product of Peeta and I's love. I find myself wondering what I did to deserve either of them.

Haymitch visits daily, his breath smelling less and less like alcohol each time. He just cradles Everly, constantly telling her stories though she is far too young to understand them. Peeta and I take a walk then, winding through the woods until we find the lake.

" I love you," Peeta makes sure to tell me each day.

And I make sure to respond with, " I love you, too."

As the months pass by, Everly changes. Eventually, she can move her body on her own, and the first time she smiles, I run all the way down to the bakery to get Peeta. But when we return not five minutes later, she is wailing, pounding her tiny fists on the floor.

" So. . ." Peeta says, " this is smiling?"

" Ugh, no!" I elbow him in the ribs hard.

We try everything to get her to stop, but she screams every time either of us touch her. When Peeta offers to go get Haymitch, I am sure he will fail too, but as he picks her up, she silences her cries.

Haymitch smirks. " Somebody has a favourite!"

I make a noise of disgust. " You're not her favourite - I am!"

" Are you sure, Katniss?"

" Positive, Haymitch," I reply, narrowing my eyes at him.

We argue for a long time before I finally give in, letting him have his moment.

That night, after we have tucked our baby into her cot, we end up kissing. I am slammed against the bed as soon as the door is closed, Peeta's mouth on mine.

" Do you wanna-?" he asks playfully.

I say nothing, just nod.

All I can think about is that I would do it all again. Everything, losing Prim and going through the Games - if it meant being with him, I'd do it all again.

I hear of Gale.

I guess I shouldn't be surprised. He was my best friend, it's not as if he's out of my life or anything.

A letter arrives at my door one day, and, glad that Peeta is at the bakery and that Everly is sleeping, I read it. It is from Gale.

After, I rip it into tiny pieces and through them, one by one, into the fire, watching them burn. Then, I go upstairs and burry my face in my pillow, and I scream and I scream and I scream.

Peeta must know something is up when he gets home, because while he tucks our daughter into bed, I sit at the kitchen table, Gale's letter playing over in my head.

Katniss,
It feels weird not to call you Catnip, but I guess we're passed that, huh? I heard about Peeta and Everly, and I'm glad you found what you want. I too found someone to love, a girl named Lana from District 4. We are engaged and expecting our first child in winter. I just thought you should know that I hope-

" Katniss?"

I turn my head to look at Peeta.

" Everly is asleep. Are you ready to come to bed?" he asks.

We go to bed and fall asleep. Or, at least, Peeta does, I stay awake, tossing and turning.

Because I know Gale. I know this is his way of rubbing it in, of saying "you got a better life but mines is better".

I realise he is wrong, because I have the best life I could've ever wished for. I may have not had the best start in life, but amongst that, I found the time to be happy. I found the time to create memories. I find comfort in that.

I find closure.

GO CHECK OUT MY ONESHOT CALLED THE LAKE!!