I'm A Mess (Minsung) Detective x Serial Killer (COMPLETED)

Chapter 34

*Two years later*

August 18, 2022
1:30 pm

Minho's P.O.V

"Shhh, Jiji, shhh." I cradle my crying two year old son in my arms, swaying him back and forth to calm him down. "Maia, hand me the teething ring out of the freezer please."

"Yes, daddy." My eight year old girl runs to the fridge and grabs the ice cold teething ring, handing it over to me.

"Thank you love, now clean up your toys, uncle Channie will be here any minute." She nods and starts cleaning up as I slide the teething toy into Jisung's mouth. He takes it gladly and calms down just as the doorbell rings.

"I'm coming, I'm coming." I exclaim tiredly as I set my baby in his swing and go to the door. "Hey hyung," I greet Chan as he comes in, carrying in gifts for the kids even though there's no holiday.

"I brought whiskey," he holds up the bottle with a chuckle and I smile.

"I will definitely be needing that, the bottle can go on the countertop and the presents can go on the dining table even though my children don't need anymore gifts at the moment." He chuckles in reply as he goes to set the items in their rightful places.

"How have you been, Minho?" Chan asks and I pause for a moment to think before answering.

"I'm alright....tired and busy, but I'm alright." I reply and he nods.

"We could use you down at the station, you know."

"Hyung I retired from the task force after I adopted Jisung, remember?"

"Yes, I remember....said you wanted to solely focus on just the kids while you can." I nod.

"And that's exactly what I'm doing." He's about to say something else before our conversation is interrupted by Maia running into the room.

"Uncle Channie!" She runs towards him and squeals when he lifts her up and spins her around.

"Hey munchkin, how's my favorite pumpkin in the patch, hm?" Chan smiles as he puts her down and hugs her.

"I'm good...how are you and auntie?"

"We're doing absolutely wonderful, you've got a cousin coming in just a couple weeks, don't you?" Maia smiles proudly and nods.

"Mhm." Chan smiles back before responding.

"And she is going to love you to bits and pieces." He starts tickling her, her laughter filling the room as my train of thought gets lost within my mind.

I watch them play together, thinking about how that would have been my boyfriend playing with her instead of Chan, if Jisung had lived.

Maia knows about Jisung, knows that he's in heaven watching over her as her second dad and she knows I named her little brother after him.

Life has been rough without him....sure I've been trying to heal, but when it gets right down to it the pain never really goes away. It never really disappears. It stays there, numb in the back of your mind for the remainder of your life. Never forgotten.

"Minho?" Chan's voice echoes in my ears but I can't fully hear or understand him. "Minho? You okay?" He shakes my shoulder lightly.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I look over at him and try to smile convincingly.

"What's on your mind?"

"Jisung..." I murmur.

"You still miss him, don't you?" I nod.

"The pain never leaves, hyung...it stays here, rotting in abandonment and neglect until it comes up as a topic again, the only times the pain is restored. I could never forget about him." I stare at my phone lockscreen, a picture of me and Jisung looking back at me. Bright, loving, unending....hopeful.

I could describe him in so many other words but my tongue fails to speak them, to utter them into existence.

"I keep waiting for him to call me. In the middle of the night, crying, to tell me he's sorry. To tell me he made the greatest mistake of his life. I keep telling myself that one day he'll come back, that he'll give me a reason to trust him again. That one day, he'll come back and make me fall in love all over again," I admit.

"I know it's stupid, and I know I'm an idiot for believing that things like that happen outside of fairytales. But as much as my head knows that he's gone and won't come back, my heart still leaves my phone on full volume every night." Both of us go silent for a few minutes, an extremely long pause ensuing.

"Daddy, I wanna play with Sungie." Maia exclaims and I nod in reply.

"Okay but be careful, he's still little."

"I know, daddy." She giggles before running off as a small tear makes its way down my cheek. Chan looks at me worriedly.

"May I offer you some advice? You might not like it but I think it might be something you need to hear right now." I nod.

"Go ahead, anything will work at this point." Chan clears his throat.

"He's gone, you know. And you need to stop doing that thing. That thing where you're latching onto the last ounce of hope in your heart, that he'll come back to you one day. That he'll call late at night and tell you he's sorry and that he's on his way to beg you for forgiveness.

Because he's not going to. And he's not sorry. He wasn't sorry, not for hurting his victims. He's gone. And you know that. Hell, you've known that forever. And it's time you stop hoping now. Because God knows how much it tears you apart...and it's time to start healing.

It's time.

It's finally time to let go."