noun: someone; a person (more so woman) who puts forth the less fortuitous before themselves in compassions of nurturing and honoring the distinct.
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BEYONCÉ KNOWLES
Grow a pair.
Being square in the depth of Onika's home was solely foreign.
"Make yourself at home, Bey." She'd prompted swiftly and on the verge of calling me her beloved 'baby girl' again. Like that, she'd disappeared behind the tall walls trimmed in aesthetical art.
My jaw clenched instantly, my feet tread fervently, pathing down the short foyer that opened right into an ante-room. It almost looked like a small castle on the outside; Everything was asymmetrical yet still well balanced and sharply paved. The inside unfolded into a much wider space and more modern-day looking furniture and design accompanied the interior.
It fitted Onika Maraj. Down to the bone; Her home was beautiful and a perfect replica of her status.
I don't know exactly what it was I wanted out of Onika at this point, but I know precisely what I didn't want and that was to be screwed over by her cold antics. Whether that went for us being friends, more than so, or even enemies nowadays. If I remained friends with her, my feelings would grow profound. Coming from someone who is overly sensitive and sacred with her feelings, not truly giving anyone a chance at my heart, it was all scary and dangerous to me.
Onika knows I'm that girl yet she still carried out her funny ways. It was hard to tell if she was deliberately doing so or if her treating my feelings like they weren't valid enough, genuinely went over her head that she didn't see where she was unmistakably hurting me in the process. It was a big deal for me and I didn't care if it was a foolish complaint to anyone else.
I had no doubts that she didn't think once about being plain out dead and wrong. Onika had a killer way with her words, I'll give her that. That was my mainstream to her; She always fucking knows what to say and it pisses me off when I choked up in spurs of us communicating. It was like a mind game she was always playing, all in my head and screwing up my thought process in the best way while in reality, when all things are said and up for debate, it resulted in only the worst way.
For me, of course, and it would always be, so it seemed, I was always being hurt in the end. Not that Ms. Maraj was the enemy here, but my lack of resilience to stand my own emotions for a durable and assuring period. It's why I could never fully submit to welcoming anyone new in my life and granting them my trust.
This woman here though, God was she something? She was Romeo in a full female figure. The definition of a Princess' Charming. Ultimately the smoothest operator and pickup artist. Everything that came with her was hard to resist. Her gift of the gab was different in many ways I could name off the back. I didn't want to attach myself to her but my body was a magnet and Onika was a human walking jump scare magnet. The opposite of my pole and they had certainly attracted to each other.
