What Am I Doing Wrong?

Life lessons being learnt . . .

If one more guy disappoints me then I am so killing myself. That is just how low my self esteem was. I did not understand that a woman should never depend on a man to make her happy. First make yourself happy and then go out there and find a partner who understands when your happiness comes first. One who does not make you feel guilty when you want to be by yourself, one who understands when you need them every once in a while. A man who prays with you, for you and because of you. I remember how I stayed up all night praying, begging, crying for God to bless me with this kind of man. A man who puts God first in every situation. A man who would not get irritated when you did not feel like yourself. A man who went out of his way to make sure that you are healthy. A man who knows just what you need when you are feeling down. A man who knows what you want to eat when you are sad. Someone who takes time and actually studies you as his woman.
After all the heart break I have been through. God has finally sent me this man! How am I this lucky? Me out of all people, who does not have patients for people who are being slow in the supermarkets. I don’t even understand myself the way this man understands me. But what I appreciate about him is the fact that he respects me, he wants me to achieve my dreams. The list goes on. What I fail to understand, is why me? What have I done to deserve this? Me who has done so many people wrong. I find it hard till this day to control my temper. I understand that everything happens for a reason, but what have I done to become so lucky and to feel so loved. God did not just send me an amazing man, but he also sent me amazing friends who actually care for me. Friends who actually care that I achieve my dreams.
God has finally been answering my prayers . . . every prayer that I have ever said is now slowly falling into place. I thank God everyday for my life and everyone he sends my way. . . I am starting to appreciate even the smallest things in life. After all life is too short not to know God!
My life isn’t always great though.