A Plane in the Ass

One

"All boarding flight BA2490 leaving for Manchester boarding now." blasts through the airport speakers as a frazzled Harry joins the line of people waiting to board. If hell was a day, he was living it. 

This morning his alarm clock had gone of late so after falling out of bed and then slipping on the morning newspaper he had dumped on the floor the previous morning, he had taken the quickest shower known to mankind and hurried to catch the bus that would take him to the airport. 

While on the bus, looking like a sodden puppy out in the rain due to the frown on his lips and his wet hair, Harry happened to sit next to a poor mother and father who were trying desperately to keep their five children under control. The babies had cried the entire hour to the airport while the two boys basically had a wrestling match in their seats. 

One of the little girls had sat down next to him and stared the entire ride there. Harry would be lying if he said it wasn't uncomfortable. Sure he used to girls going weak over his charming personality and curls but she couldn't be over six and when the driver finally arrived at his terminal Harry bolted leaving the exhausted parents and their kids behind.

"Excuse me, where is security?" He had desperately asked a man standing by the door in a uniform. Harry had been in an airport for the longest time and felt overwhelmed by all the blinking signs and arrows pointing in various directions.

The man helped Harry get to security with a warm smile but that just lead Harry to another set of problems.

While going through security the stupid machine had mistaken his hairbrush for a weapon. As if his morning could get any worse. All the alarms had gone off and he was escorted away from the rest of the people while two officers went through all his bags and another patted him down with a wand. 

After discovering the so-called deadly weapon was a hairbrush, they had apologized profusely and even gave him a coupon to Starbucks for their mistake but now he was going to almost miss his flight so the coupon wasn't much use.

"Welcome aboard," the flight attendant greeted him as he stepped aboard the aircraft and he returned her uber-sweet smile though he was exhausted and annoyed on the inside. He was never one to give people shit because he felt like shit. It was one of the traits he liked about himself, Harry was straight-up kind. 

He scanned the rows of seats until finding his towards the back and when he found it, placed his carry-on luggage in the overhead bins and sighed. He had made it. This trip for his sister's wedding better be worth the late alarm clock, the staring six-year-old, security, and all the running through the airport like a maniac he had done to get on his flight on time.

"For fucks sakes." he muttered when he saw he wouldn't be able to nag the window seat for a petite guy with thin brown hair covered by a beanie sat there, fiddling with a pair of earbuds.

"Excuse you?" he said looking up, his piercing blue eyes making Harry stagger back for a moment.

"Nothing, um, would you mind if I take the window seat? I kind of have a thing for flying."

"No."

"What?" Harry asked, surprised by the short answer.

"Did you not hear me the first time? I. Said. No."

Jesus Christ, he was going to have to sit next to a bitchy teenager for the whole flight. "Have it your way," Harry said and plopped down next to the boy who was now adjusting his backpack under his seat. "But if I throw up, I'll be aiming it towards you." 

So much for being kind.

"You wouldn't dare." the boy said frowning. "Control yourself and your liquids. Flying isn't that scary."

"It is if you have a fear of heights." he contradicts.

The boy is about to retort when an older woman with poofy blonde hair sits down next to me and pulls out a water bottle from her purse, "Don't you just hate flying?"

Harry turn in surprise and then nod, "I was actually just saying that. Yes, I do hate flying."

"And don't you just hate it when your former ex-boyfriend can't control his drinking habits so you have to fly across the god damn country to get your children."

"I, um, no." Harry turned towards the boy who had the smuggest smile on his face,

"Well, this flight just got better." he whistled.

Never in his life had Harry taken such a dislike for a person so quickly. No, he was nice, he liked to treat people with kindness but this boy was just so arrogant and so self-centered Harry was about to stomp on his foot in annoyance.

"And aren't you a cute little thing." the woman said eyeing Harry. Her face was coated in thick makeup and her crazy long eyelashes made Harry back up in his seat until he was practically laying onto the other boy.

"Um, yeah I've heard that before." Harry gulped. She was making him extremely nervous like she was about to eat him whole.

"I'll bet." she gave him a wink.

"Shove off?" the boy he was squishing into the window asked and tried to shove Harry off of his seat.

"No way in hell." Harry whispered back to the boy, "Did you see her? She looked ready to eat me!"

"Oh please." the boy rolled his eyes and once again Harry found himself gazing at how blue they were. Like one of the tropical beaches you see in travel brochures.

"This wouldn't be happening if I had the window seat," Harry muttered, not moving.

"You are squishing me. Get off!" the boy gave one last shove and Harry shifted back into his seat.

"That took you a while." He noted looking down at the boy's thin arms. "What are you fifteen?"

"I'm twenty," he growled and straightened his striped shirt in annoyance.

Harry goggled at the boy sitting next to him, "Twenty?"

"Yes, two zero." he fired back.

This guy was older than me, Harry thought in disbelief. Harry had been sure he was a teenager, at least he acted like one.

"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome onboard Flight BA2490 with service from London to Manchester. We are currently third in line for take-off and are expected to be in the air in approximately seven minutes' time. 

We ask that you please fasten your seatbelts at this time and secure all baggage underneath your seat or in the overhead compartments. Please turn off all personal electronic devices, including laptops and cell phones. Smoking is prohibited for the duration of the flight. Thank you for choosing Mountain Airlines. Enjoy your flight." the flight attendant announces in the overhead speaker and I sigh. 

This is going to be one long flight.

a/n

Ayo beautiful human,

idk where this story is going to go...this is more of a filler story until I have finished outlining my other one. I thought of the idea a while ago and thought it might be fun. No update schedule, I'm just going to update when inspiration strikes. 

lmk what you think, any ideas. I'm hoping to get a lot of bickering/dialogue in this fic sooo enjoy!

All the luv Minzey ♡