Air ais ~Outlander~

《Eighteen》Skye

The question of Jamie kept playing in mine mind and I looked at Eilidh who sat at the table with Janet and Ian.
When she was little she asked a few times if she could have a brother or a sister like the other kids in her class. And to be honest I tought about that. But I was always stopped at the point when I realised that child was not Jamie'.
And now I had a change to have that and I hesitated about it. Even when I said I was not mad anymore I still had a  strange feeling.
"Michael Is duin fur it," Jamie walked in with Michael and pressed a kiss on my hair.
"Than we should go." I stood up. "Eilidh are you coming to?" I asked the young girl and she jumped up.
Jamie looked puzzled at me and I looked back at him.
"She is coming, it's safe up there," I turned around before he protested.
"Bring mah son hail back. Wid ye please," Jenny made James promise and he only nodded.
He wave at us three and we left towards the cliff.

Throught the binocular Jamie watched Micheal swim to the Island while I pressed Eildih closer to me to protect her from the wind.
"He must be freezing," I noticed and Jamie only hummed. "How is your arm?" I nodded at his wounded arm who hanged around his neck in a make shift sling.
"Fine," he placed the binocular down. "We barely hae bin alone sin Auld Reekie,"
"We are still not alone," I looked down at Eilidh.
"Is that th' reason how come she is 'ere? sae ye cuid jook a chat aboot whit happend." He asked and I looked up from her to him again.
"We have talked and everything is settled," I noticed. "What is there left to say more?"
"Ye haven't talked aboot whit ye think aboot it. 'n' ah ken ye'r nae crabbit anymair," his voice suddenly turned softer. "Bit fur yer daein'. Skye. Ye whaur tae fleet at peace wi' this. This insae lik' ye used tae be."
"Because I don't know what to think about this Jamie," I finally confessed. "One moment I don't want to lose you and the other I think this is a mistake and we no longer belong together," I looked away. "And then yesterday you talked about other childeren and I desperately want them with you but on the other hand I don't! Because for God's sakes Jamie admit it. We grew apart the last ten years and we are different now from what we where,"
"Hiw cuid ye say that?" He asked a bit angry and I felt Eilidh shift a little.
"I had a life! We both had lifes." I looked at him. "And families. And to be honest I almost didn't go back because I finally had my father back in my life. The way I always wanted." I looked at him. "And you had your printshop. In Edinburgh. Which wasn't that bad right?"
"Bein' a printar is hee haw compared tae bein' yer guidman 'n' th' faither o' oor childeren," he looked at Eilidh who broke herself lose from me and walked towards her father whom she hugged from the waist.
It broke my heart a little and I took a deep breath before I answered. "For ten years I was haunted by the memorie of you." I looked this time straight at him.
"The moment I found out you where alive. I..." I hesitated and Jamie shifted his look from me quickly at the Island then back to me. The wind playing with his hair. "But since I been back. It's. It's much harder than expected."
"Whin wis it ever been easy?" He asked and I shifted my look this time towards the Island. "Skye,' he walked towards me leaving Eilidh alone. "Bit ah apologised fur it." I looked at him. "Ah hae dane a' ah kin tae mak' it richt,"
"But was that enough Jamie?" I whispered soft enough only for him to hear.
"Aye," he laid his hand on my cheek. "Ye belong wi' me," he looked quick over his shoulder to Eilidh. "She belongs tae me," I laid mine face at his hand. "We ur mated fur lee mò gràdh,"
I took a deep breath before he continued.
"Wull ye risk th' man a'm fur th' sake o' th' yin ye wance knew?" He asked.
Before I could answer Eilidh yelled. "Momma, Da!" I quickly pushed Jamie aside and rushed towards her. She pointed towards the Island.
"Christ," Jamie letted out.
Behind the Island a big ship appeared.
Jamie took his binocular. I quickly pulled Eilidh closer as I was anxiously waited for Jamie's response.
From here I could see the people of the ship entered the Island and Jamie started yelling Micheal name.
"Came," he rushed as quickly as he can down the hill and me and Eilidh followed him as quick as we could.
"JAMIE! NO YOUR ARM!" I yelled as he took of his coat and he stopped. "I'll go," I started to take of mine cape but he stopped me.
"Thay awready git him," he said pained and all we could do was watching the ship sail away and think about away how we could tell Jenny and Ian it without getting murdered.