DEAD ASS LOVE! (Deadpool x Reader)(EDITING)

Struggle

Deadpool's POV

(TW: this chapter will have mention of suicide,

Also to Mention Deadpool Also Struggles with a lot of stuff too, the poor man has a lot of trauma, and Honestly I do not blame him.)

I was laying on the floor healing myself since I had to fight some weird-ass lizard dude, soon to be held captive by the x-whores. Yes, I call them x-whores Because x-men is LAME, Pretty funny huh? Well, today is going to be even more stressful knowing that Y/N will be Moving in with me. I actually wonder if this would be okay, I don't know if she can handle me healing slowly, Literally not going to lie I'm even disgusted by how it heals.

Though it would be pretty funny for her to walk in with me having a baby arm or something. Colossus was the Most PUSHIEST bitch ever and honestly I get what he is trying to do but I refuse to get close to anyone at some point. I slowly get up and change out of my now ripped-up suit which is fine since I have MANY suits, I change into some sweatpants and a redshirt.

I take off my mask slowly and sigh staring into the mirror, I didn't mind my face but The fact that it reminds me of everything that happened, Of being used as a Lab rat for some dipshits. They ruined everything for me and Honestly part of it wasn't them too, It was me as well ruining my life slowly. I mean Overall the number of TIMES I tried fucking dying but it ends up with Colossus giving me a lecture of how I shouldn't take it for granted and that I could do a lot of good things. Yeah no, I learned my lesson by trying to be trainy in The X-whores. I felt a bit of anger rush up, the thoughts all over my head made me frustrated. I slowly ball my hands into a fist and Punch the mirror, the glass shatter everywhere and the cracked-up mirror was proving my point.

I was doomed to be like this and there's nothing I can do about it. My knuckles had glass in them, I didn't give a shit, to be honest, it'll heal later. I Noticed how messy my apartment was, Guns and weapons everywhere, clothes, leftover food, Magazines. I didn't give a fuck anymore who cares if it's messy, I mean I'm pretty sure Y/N will leave as soon as possible realizing how dirty my apartment was.

I then also thought about my Job, It can get Y/N in danger and Colossus would be PISSED at me. I slowly grab a notebook and some crayons. Writing down some rules and stuff to make sure nothing gets me in trouble. I honestly don't know why I'm doing this but it's just in case if she actually stays which I doubt. I throw the notebook and lay on the couch staring at the ceiling waiting for the Girl to knock. Ugh, it's so boring waiting, In fact, I could actually finish a whole season of Spongebob BECAUSE SHE TAKES FOREVER. I didn't even agree to this bullshit! I mean yeah I did blow up her apartment but she said it herself she will figure it out!! OUT OF ALL PEOPLE WHY ME TOO!?!? The fact that Colossus Betrayed me and SHAMED ME!! At least I saved her! I CANT GET A BREAK!! Ugh well, maybe she can be useful by a lot of things ;) or maybe she can actually cook for me- WAIT Wait what am I thinking!?! I should be thinking about the fucking negative things, not the positive what the actual shit is wrong with me.

I wonder where I left my pistol.. I get up slowly and walk around my messy apartment. I remember putting a bunch of cute stickers and dazzle shit on it where the hell did it go!! THAT WAS MY FAVORITE. I SWEAR TO GOD PLEASE!! I start to trash my living room a bit more not knowing where I left it. I realized I left it in the bathtub. I rush my way over there and grab it, I heard a notification from my phone, and I open it to see weasel telling me I have another mission. I honestly rather go to the mission than to meet up with Y/N or whatever her name is. Eh, she will be fine, It won't be my fault if she actually ends up shooting herself or something. I run to get my suit back on and pack my personal weapons including hand sanitizer. I like to be clean okay? Ugh with all that filthy blood on me makes me gag.