It's never as it seems.
What I want.
What I need.
What I crave.
What I feel I deserve.
It seems it doesn't matter who I am.
Or what I endured.
Who I endured it with.
It seems my experience.
Is one that I must feel on my own.
A feeling I have never experienced.
Accustomed to feeling everything.
By everyone.
Accustomed to feeling badgered by,
Feelings I no longer want to feel.
Accustomed to converting to,
What everyone wants.
It never seems,
I get to feel,
Like myself.
What I want to be.
What I need to be.
What I crave deep inside of me.
Doesn't seem like I deserve,
The pain and trauma around me.
But it seems I must push through,
Until a new day comes,
When what I want.
What I need,
What I crave.
What I feel I deserve,
Will be valid.
I will matter.
YOU ARE READING
Dim.
PoetryTired of trying to be everything. Trying to be perfect. Wrong paths and wrong people and missed opportunities. Am I letting my mental illness take over my life? A look into the mind of a BPD, Anxiety ridden woman. With no identity but her Panic. W...