« am i in your mind? sometimes? »
« i'd lie if i said it was jus' sometimes. »
in which lulu jenson has to handle
a bunch of shit and finds herself
looking for comfort in fezco.
[EUP...
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PART III. LULU " Emotions aren't just for the big screen "
I remember when it happened the first time. 'Cause it was the day my dad left. I was fifteen. And everything inside of me just... shut down. Everything I did after he disappeared felt... robotic.
Lulu didn't notice her mother falling on the ground with Zahia kneeling in front of her as they both cried painfully. Lulu didn't feel her entire body shaking and her breathing slowing more and more each second.
And then she heard this buzzing sound. Everything was silent but it was so quiet that it all became incredibly loud.
And it all stopped moving. Lulu was glued near the front door and it became terrifying. As if she was staring at a painting that didn't move, didn't breathe, didn't feel a single thing.
Lifeless, she stumbled against the walls and walked inside the room that held so many wonderful memories with her father from her childhood.
I stole bottles of whisky in his office, I locked myself in my room and I drank.
It was the very first time Lulu drank alcohol on her own. Usually, it was at parties, with Rue. It was filled with fun and laughter.
Not this time though.
And Lulu stopped drinking when the world started spinning again.
When I woke up I was in Rue's bed.
Rue had been taking care of Lulu all night. From the moment she knocked on her window to the moment she hardly explained what had happened a few houes earlier because of how intoxicated she was, Rue didn't let her go one second.
She helped her get undressed, helped her under the shower and kept her arms firmly around her shaking body to get her to fall asleep.
The following morning, Lulu couldn't be happier to have a best friend like Rue by her side.
. . .
Now, Lulu was at the beach with her agent, Enolla, telling her everything that had happened with her mother a few days back to get it out of her chest. It felt weird to the young girl to open up this much to her artistic representative.
"Do you think that's what pushed your mother away?" Enolla asked.
Lulu shrugged her shoulders, "Well... I don't know... I-I'm not in her brain like... I think it was too much. I think.... I think she could've died for my dad."
