Cape May

The Greatest Love of All

And so we fell in love that spring of 99, she in love with me and I in love with her. And I know many may say, 'Fall in love, what are you talking about, they're only kids.  Kids don't know what love is.'  And to that I beg to differ. It was only because we were young and innocent that we could fall in love, truly in love, innocent and ignorant love. And looking back, that is the greatest love of all.

Innocent, because our hearts were pure. Innocent, because I loved my sister from way before. It was a love based on love. The purest of all. Innocent because I was her protector, and my love was just an extension of that. In her eyes, I was her world from the very start, the one she could tease and annoy and know that no matter what she did, I could take it, I would take it, without any retribution, that I was strong. I was her rock. She was like the little bird in my hand that I would nourish, protect and love forever even as she pecked at me and drew blood. And when that love we had for each other as brother and sister was now brought together with the love we now had as man and woman, it just served to heighten that love a thousand-fold.

It was a powerful emotion, an intoxicating aphrodisiac that overwhelmed our senses and I believe now, perhaps we were too young to comprehend the power of that love. And so, we just reveled in it, basking in its glory, it's innocence.

Ignorant love, because we didn't know any better. Most adults enter relationships with baggage, rules, stipulations, boundaries and limitations. They've been hurt before, betrayed, used and abused. They refuse to be vulnerable again, fearing that vulnerability will be their downfall, when in fact it is vulnerability that will bring them their greatest joy.

They bring huge trunks of baggage from old relationships into the new ones and are determined that their new lover will not do them like the last. And so, they adopt the ever popular, 'I'll meet you halfway' philosophy of relationships. But unbeknownst to them, they are setting themselves up for guaranteed failure, for fifty percent of anything always brings it down, never up.

Fifty percent of four is two. Of two, is one and so on. It is an equation made for failure and yet they believe that they will protect their heart and find love while giving only fifty percent. It is the parody of love, the downfall of adults, because they know better. They believe, with all their heart that if they bring fifty percent and their partner brings fifty percent than that would make a whole and they'd have the most perfect relationship ever known to mankind. Unfortunately, math has no exceptions. That's why mathematicians could tell you with a great degree of accuracy at what speed an object will hit the ground if dropped from a certain height. What the impact would be on a person if a bullet is fired from x feet away. What the speed of a planet would be as it draws closer and closer to the sun and, unfortunately, what the odds are of a relationship enduring if each person only brings fifty percent.

And then there is always that other unspoken fifty percent that lays untouched, hidden from both lovers, hidden from the world, never seeing the light of day and therefore never playing a part in what may otherwise be.... the love of a lifetime.

A one-winged eagle cannot soar as eagles were meant to soar. Two one winged eagles do not make one and so you have two majestic beings relegated to picking scraps off the forest floor.

Gabby and me, we had no such limitations. Since we loved each other from the start and had no prior relationship experience, we were not burdened with the baggage that stifles so many adults. We were willing to be vulnerable, perhaps from innocence or ignorance, but we were willing to love completely, heart and soul, to open ourselves to each other without fear or shame, come what may. And it was only through this vulnerability that we were able to soar as eagles. There was no ceiling on our love. There were no limitations from past betrayals or pains from relationships gone bad. We were able to love and be loved with the ignorance that comes with youth.