Cape May

Sexy

Hey Gabby, you know, I realized something that day. It was like a seismic shift, but that day I realized, I mean really realized that you had changed. You became a woman in my eyes that day.."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you remember how all your life you would tell on me, rat me out kinda, like to get me in trouble?"

"Yeah. "

"Well, that day you did something so out of the ordinary, something so out of character that I knew you loved me for real. That day you became a grown up. You stood up for me. You defended me, jumping in front of mommy, who by the way had a knife in her hand and was crazy mad. You remember that?'

"Yeah, but it wasn't even a matter of thinking. I knew I had to protect you cause yeah, mommy was really pissed.'

"Imagine that, you became my protector. But that day my love for you grew so much. I mean, not only did you protect me, but you were willing to take the blame...'

"Bobby, the only reason why I used to tell on you and stuff was to get your attention, to make you notice me. It was the only way I knew. But after we became lovers, I didn't need to resort to those childish ways. I had you. I had you in the palm of my hands,' she says as she breaks out smiling. "I had your attention always and that's all I ever wanted. I would've jumped in front of a train for you Bobby."

_____________________________

"Kissing connoisseur. You were quite the kissing connoisseur."

"You weren't to bad yourself which makes me want to ask, how'd you learn to kiss so good?"

"Oh Bobby, I never kissed a boy. But when you put you tongue in my mouth, I guess I just did what comes natural.

"Hey, don't you think it's funny that we can talk about this some seventeen years later as if it's all normal, like, we ended up normal, didn't we? We're not fucked up with mental issues. I mean, I haven't had to see a shrink or anything like that. I don't think you had to, I mean like you look and act all normal, right?"

"Normal is all relative Bobby. It's all relative."

I thought I heard a strain in her voice. I did not ask what she meant by that statement. Perhaps I did not want to hear what was to follow or perhaps I was not ready for the floodgates that would open letting out all the things I have tried so hard to repress for the last seventeen years. Instead, I quickly changed the subject before she could continue with her train of thoughts.

"Hey, there's something I've wanted to ask you all these years, but never got around to it. You remember that first time, in Cape May?"

"Oh, do I remember. Bobby, that was so magical, it was like a fantasy. When you kissed me. The first time I was like, like I really didn't know if it was actually happening or if it was a sudden lapse of reality on my part because I wasn't quite sure weather you were going to do it or not. That day and every day after that I was in cloud nine...."

That wasn't exactly what I was going to ask her about, but I allowed her to continue for it was sounding interesting.

"Yeah, but didn't you at any point say like, hey what the fuck is he

doing. This is so wrong. He's my brother. Did you feel at any time that

I was forcing myself on you?"

"Nah, Bobby, cause you were so gentle and such a gentleman about it. I mean until you kissed me the second time. When you looked at me and said in that fucking sexy voice, 'Gabby, you're so beautiful,' I thought I'd just died and went to heaven..."

"Even though It was your brother who just kissed you and said that? I mean come on, you must have thought on some level that what I did was way out of line."

"Not really Bobby. You kissed me just at the right time. I mean it was just such perfect timing. It was like something out of the movies. I mean, there we were, you on top of me, me screaming at you and you did what the hero would do, shut me up with a kiss and we'd fall in love forever and ever. What girl wouldn't want that? It was like a fairy tale.

"Yeah, you did look really fucking sexy, all mad like that, fire in your eyes. I just couldn't resist. How about in the garage, when I started feeling you up. You knew what I was doing and yet you did nothing. What was up with that?"

"Well, believe it or not, I my self was full of hormones and I kinda liked it. Don't forget, you always treated me like something to be avoided. Then when I started developing and I noticed the effect it had on you, well.... and don't think for one second I didn't notice you checking me out all the time. Checking out my ass, my boobs. I felt your eyes on me. You were hopeless Bobby and well, there's no other way to put it, but I was, it was, well, it was kind of a compliment cause for once in my life I know you saw me as more than just that skinny little bagobones, pain in the ass little sister, like you always used to say.

When you would look at me the way you did, it made me feel pretty, sexy, like a woman. You know what it is for a woman to feel sexy Bobby? I think it defines us as a sex. For a female to feel sexy or to be made to feel sexy is what we live for. It is what we strive for always. I don't care what any woman may tell you otherwise. You made me feel sexy Bobby. I knew you were stealing glances at me and I knew why. I would walk around the house feeling your eyes on me and I was just like in heaven. I who once was a skinny, undefined girl who could only get your attention when you were trying to get rid of me, now you couldn't get enough of me. That was a game changer Bobby, a real game changer.

I felt like a grown up. It was titillating to know I could have that effect on you."

"Titillating? Hmmm, talking about titillating, we did do some titillating stuff didn't we?"

"If by titillating, you mean crazy, yeah Bobby, we did some crazy delicious stuff, but only cause we were so in love