The Beginning Of My Ending (On Hold)

Chapter Seven: Mind's Maze

The most exhilarating experiences are generated in the mind, triggered by information that challenges your thinking.

You see Mesa used to tell me that revolutionary thinker's don't use the heart.

Maybe she was right, using our hearts to make decisions that might affect us isn't always an option. Maybe that's why we have heartless people in our world. They understand that being heartless is not by being mean sometimes maybe its just a way of them protecting their hearts from the crook's in this world.

Using our minds can be great. If most of us used our minds, half of us wouldn't be suffering the problems we suffer from today. If most people in this world used their minds we wouldn't have half of the world problems we have today. Heartless people motivate me sometimes. I envy them on how they can have so much ease by being heartless.

Although using the mind wouldn't be the best idea, yeah we would have a lot of heartless people but thing is we do already have such people. We live in a cruel world, with even more ferocious people.

If we used our minds most of the time we would have a lot of mental breakdowns, mental problems and a lot of us suffering from mental stability. Using our minds  means we have to think and we think about the things we wish we would forget, we think about the what ifs or maybes . We would create so many scenarios and over envision everything. This world would have more 'mentally unstable' people than we already have.

Maybe that's why we use the mind and heart to think, they stabilize us or they fight each other for dominance. And I just fail to understand why they stabilize us and yet they are the very same organs that can be the end of us - figuratively saying. We have people who use feelings when they make decisions and we get people that use facts and now that's a big difference.

And I just don't understand the difference sometimes because people who use feelings to make decisions always care about those around them most of the time, they care about how one feels and another's opinion. They have a heart.

And people who use facts or have their own decision, don't care about your opinion. They do what they gotta do and they do it, they make decisions based on the current situation, they think before they react and feelings are mostly put on the side. Some of them are heartless.

That's how I see it though, maybe I'm wrong.

Or we just shouldn't think. That's dumb but if it's the only way of avoiding our dark passages then so be it.

We are living in our minds maze basically.

Because our minds have this maze-like character, so do our lives. My rational mind is in no more than a puzzle collection of passages, insecurities, mistakes and journey's that in fact go nowhere, my life is basically reflecting this fact everyday until I stop reflecting and start reflecting on something else, my life turns into the repetitive attempt to escape through all the various illusion exits that my mind provides me with. Because my understanding is nonexistent, so is my life. If my mind is like a maze, then naturally I spend all my time trapped in this maze, instead of being free to experience the world outside, which by definition is not closed.

We all have an alternate world within us where we can day dream and imagine. People call this the imagination, but I call this the Nile. The Nile reminds me of the Nile river, the water flows in one direction before it splits and flows through a path towards another direction, just like our lives we have this life that we currently have then unexpected things happen. we are then forced to take that path reluctantly. Just like our imaginations, we create this heaven within us where we can build this fantasy world or alternate world. Everyone is different and we are different. In our minds maze we can make it seem peaceful where your mind creates the life and peace the you long for. Where you can disappear every time you close your eyes. Trapping the worlds chaos out of it. Headphones and lyrics in the background, eyes closed and a imaginary smile in your face. Where your dreams become reality within you.