Where There's a Howl There's a Home [2]

Chapter 8

Sang 

Angry voices whirl around me, whipping into me from all sides. Each blow felt like a powerful punch. The bad woman's voice was among the worst of them. Whore. Slut. She calls me. I run forward trying to escape them. A ledge comes into view too late. I try to stop my momentum, but it isn't possible. I fly over the edge only to see a bottomless canyon awaiting for me. I can barely breathe as the wind rushes around me as I fall.

I jolt up in bed immediately wide awake. Breathing hard, I try to calm my racing heart. I grip the comforter tightly to ground myself back to reality. I glance around the room feeling relieved that I am back at the pack house. Moonlight filters in my window, and I realize I must have been out for quite a while. Thinking about it, it all rushes back to me.

We were getting ice cream. I was so excited after everything that happened to just relax and hang out with the guys. Then that voice said my name. I recognized her. A younger face stares down at me in my memories. I grew up with her. She is my sister. Marie.

The memories flow faster and faster as I remember more and more about her. Like a plug has been removed, a flood of images overwhelms me. I need to do something, anything. I can't just sit here.

I scramble out of the bed fighting through the covers even as they tangle around me. Finally free, I stumble to my door and rip it open. I need fresh air, something, anything. Before I can take a step out into the hall, I notice something. A pair of legs. Peeking through the doorway, I find North sitting on the floor, leaning back passed out. His face is peaceful as he rests. I take a step forward and the floor boards underneath me creak in response. I freeze, but it's too late.

His eyes blink open, and he stretches out. Scanning his surroundings, his eyes widen as he spots me. He scrambles to his feet looking me over from head to toe.

"Are you okay?" He asks immediately. I open my mouth and try to answer, try to explain, but the words are stuck. I look down and shrug. A firm finger presses against my chin raising my head back up. I meet his eyes and see the turmoil there. I've learned that North cares deeply, and is also hurt when one of his pack his hurt. There is one thing I can think of that might help right now though.

Can we go look at the stars? I ask him through the pack link. His face relaxes and he nods.

"Of course, Sang Baby." Just as we turn to go downstairs, a door opens in the hall. Silas appears in the doorway rubbing his eyes.

"I heard voices," he said taking us in. "Is everything alright?" North nods.

"We were just going to look at the stars for a bit," North explains. They have a silent conversation before Silas smiles at me.

"I'll grab blankets if you don't mind one more, Aggele mou." I shake my head. I don't mind if he comes as well.

North leads me downstairs and out onto the back porch of the pack house. Silas isn't too far behind us. Soon enough, I am wrapped in a fuzzy blanket cuddled between them. We all gaze up at the clear sky. The stars are easily seen. They look beautiful in the stillness of night. Like a weight has been lifted off of my chest, I can breathe easier. Each breath I take, I relax a bit more.

"I had a nightmare," I spoke finally breaking the silence. Neither of them react at first.

"Do you think what happened today triggered it?" North asks. I shrug. It is likely, if I am being honest. I need to deal with what happened today. There is too much going on in my head. I need to sort through it all.

"I think she is my sister," I state remembering the girl. I remember her for a lot more than just today though. I remember her, younger, in a kitchen looking down on me. I was on my knees. I don't remember why, but I remember the pain. "Marie, her name is Marie."

Silas rubs my arms over the blanket giving me a bit of comfort. It helps to ground me even as the memories wish to sweep me away.

"I think I'm remembering more about before," I say not looking away from the sky. "Before the woods, before being a wolf."

"We are here for you, Sang Baby," North tells me. "No matter what. Pack is family, and family comes first." I lean over laying my head on his shoulder, a silent thanks. I am not alone. I need to remember that. In every flash I get, I remember not having anyone, being alone.

"I don't like remembering," I admitted.

"I wish I could make it not hurt, but you don't have to face the past alone, aggele," Silas says. I take their words to heart as we sit there.

"Do you think I'll see her again?" I ask.

"Do you want to?" North asks me instead of answering. I honestly don't know. I don't remember anything good about her. All I have associates her with the terrifying woman that haunts my nightmares. But what if there is good. What if I can get answers as to what happened when I was young? Did I even want those answers, though?

"I don't know," I admitted.

We stay outside for a while. The silence of the cool night helps to break the funk the nightmare had left me in. Once, I feel better we head back inside. North leads me back to my room. Thankfully, they stay with me cuddling in on each side. I don't think I will be able to get back to sleep easily, but with their heat and comfort surrounding me it is possible. I am not alone anymore. I have my pack behind me. I can face whatever tomorrow will bring even if it is more of the past.