Smile | Suicidal Todoroki x Kaminari

3 | I Care About You

This story is not intended to promote or encourage actions/behaviors such as suicide, self-harm, abuse, violence, purging, or eating disorders.

Denki Kaminari
•⊱—≬—⊰•

Todoroki's coltish departure rendered Kaminari nonplussed. A transient, acute pang jolted through Kaminari's chest, but once it dissipated, the aftershocks protracted the avid rattling of his mind. For starters, Todoroki didn't seem to be tending to his own needs, yet the student bearing a burn mark over his left eye insisted on being fine. Not only that, but Kaminari also found that his eyes were arrested by his classmate, and throughout the time they'd studied together, Kaminari's heart rate leapt up whenever he heard Todoroki's voice.

Truth be told, Kaminari's unabashed flirting and perverse actions had not been due to his being interested in everyone he saw.

ʙᴀɴɢ

When the time arrived for class to commence promptly the next morning, Kaminari strolled up to Todoroki's desk and inquired as to how the latter was feeling. Todoroki plastered on a pulchritudinous smile, and his answer was that he was feeling great. The drooping grogginess in the aura Todoroki emanated certainly contradicted the "great" response, however.

Damn, Kaminari couldn't help but think as he continued to speak with Todoroki. Girls have always caught my eye, but a few guys have also been up there as well. Todoroki is definitely one of them... A farfetched dream to win him over, but hey, what's another attempt at some obvious, horrible flirting? It makes me wonder if I could actually get someone to like me if I tried to do this the right way. Nah. I doubt it... No one would want to be with someone whose Quirk drawback is utter stupidity.

"Did you not sleep well last night?" the golden-haired student queried.

"I hope the coffee I drank this morning makes up for it," Todoroki wearily sighed. "It isn't a substitute for sleep, but to get through another long day, it'll have to do."

Kaminari tilted his head a bit. "Having a good breakfast is also energizing. Don't rely solely on coffee. Trust me... It doesn't end well." He shivered at the thought of being unable to sleep and constantly awakening in the middle of the night.

"I guess," Todoroki evasively replied.

This guy really likes being noncommittal and neutral, Kaminari cogitated. I still don't know, like, anything about him. What makes him happy? I just wanna know. I mean, unless he's hiding some major, dark secret, like being a serial killer. Geez...

As class finally began, a torrent of trepidation flooded through Kaminari's veins. He wanted to espy his friend that sat in the back of the class, but he refrained from doing so while class was still in session. To say the least, Kaminari's curiosity regarding Todoroki seemed to exponentially proliferate as time sluggishly progressed, but the former had no desire to pry—he could practically feel in his chest how uncomfortable the taciturn Todoroki had been when he dug a bit deeper for answers.

When the bell rang for lunch, Kaminari figured he'd ask Todoroki what his favorite food was as he sidled up to the latter. "Still holdin' up?" he greeted the heterochromatic student who nodded in response. "Great! So, what's your favorite food?"

"Cold soba," Todoroki answered, and as his eyes met with Kaminari's, he swiftly yet discreetly averted his gaze.

"Oh, you know they have cold soba here, right? Why don't I get some for you since you're always so nice to me?"

Todoroki's thrawn smile poked gently at his cheeks. "That's kind of you, but it's all right." He sat down at the same table in the same place as he had the previous day.

"Are you sure?" Kaminari questioned for confirmation, and he received another nod. "I know you know already, but it's not healthy to skip meals." The younger individual didn't say anything, so Kaminari continued, saying, "Hey, are you feeling okay?"

Sometimes I wonder why I keep asking, Kaminari inwardly sighed. Maybe his answer will change if I keep asking? It's probably annoying, if anything, but I'm worried. Still, I just keep asking...but I always get a similar response.

"I'm fine," Todoroki said with a slight smile.

Kaminari felt as though his heart was being squeezed as he listened to Todoroki's poignant declaration. "Is it a sensitive topic?" He bit his lower lip.

With a crumbling sangfroid, Todoroki mustered up another plastic smile that radiated with a lachrymal austerity. "Not at all."

"Well, don't be afraid to tell me if it is, because if it makes you uncomfortable, I'll also feel uncomfortable." His voice was a stream of solicitude that threatened to permeate Todoroki's solitude. "I care about you, man."

A light lathering of pink emerged from Todoroki's cheeks. "You care...about me?"

Kaminari fervently nodded. "'Course I do! I dunno what you see me as, but I see you as my friend, so of course I care about you. Friends look out for each other." Oh, how his heart erupted with syrupy effervescence once he could distinguish that Todoroki was blushing.

Holy crap does he look cute when he's blushing, Kaminari internally drawled as his doting thoughts regarding Todoroki swam through his head. Wait, is he even into other guys? Knowing me, probably not, but a man can dream, right?

"You're... Thanks, Kaminari. I also think you're a friend. But I don't think you should be friends with me." Although his smile remained, it seemed like the pinnacle of loneliness.

"How come? If anything, I'd say that I should've been the one to say that—at least you don't turn into a doofus when you overuse your Quirk."

Todoroki sighed, "I wouldn't want to be friends with myself." He promptly pivoted to a new topic. "But you're a good friend. You care."

I kind of get the impression that you want to express yourself as the person you want to be, or the person you want people to know you as, the student with hair of a gilded hay pondered. But...the person you're showing us is happy. Did your parents want you to be, well, less cold and more positively expressive? I just don't know.

"You bet I care," Kaminari reassured Todoroki with a jovial smile to match. "So, I want ya to be kind to yourself, too. Are you hungry at all?"

The younger of the two nudged his head to the left a bit, but he altered the shake of his head into a shrug with the awkward tilt of his head. "I'll be all right," he stated with another slim smile.

"You sure?" Todoroki nodded. "Okay. Hey. Did you know that I'm ecstatic to just be talking to you right now? You might not say much, but you listen, and that's something no one does when I talk to them: listen to what I have to say. So, thanks, Todoroki!"

I always feel like no one wants to listen to me because I spend a lot of my time trying to flirt, Kaminari thought. I'm also a person, right? I'm glad Todoroki seems to think so. Now that I think about it, he's always been kind to me...but I feel like he isn't very kind to himself.

⊹⊱—≬—⊰⊹
"𝖸𝗈𝗎 𝗉𝗋𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗇𝗍 𝗆𝖾 𝖿𝗋𝗈𝗆 𝖿𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖺𝗌𝗅𝖾𝖾𝗉."
𝘖𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘰𝘧𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘭𝘢𝘮𝘦...
"𝙔𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙡𝙞𝙚𝙨 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙗𝙡𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙘𝙪𝙩 𝙨𝙤 𝙙𝙚𝙚𝙥."