Err on the Side of Violence: Terribly Acronymed Detective Club Series (Book 3)

Chapter Twenty-Six: Joe, Summer, 1995

"So, what do you think?"

Joe turned and saw Lauren emerge from the bedroom of their tiny rental apartment, which had served as their home while they were saving up enough money to put a down payment on a house. Lauren was starting a new job and was modelling the uniform for him.

Joe leaned in and took the embroidered logo on the arm between his fingers. It was a knight's helmet, and he could even see the little air holes on the part that covered the face, he couldn't remember the word for it. He read the name of the company underneath the logo. "Justiciar?" he asked. "Is that even a word?"

"Apparently it is. Ralph Rose, one of the partners and the guy who interviewed me, said it was a word he found in a book for that role playing game, Dungeons and Dragons; he used to play it when he was in high school. He looked it up in the dictionary and said it refers to a judiciary officer answering to the king, and it dates back to Norman England."

"Is it pronounced justice-ee-er, or justi-sher?" 

"The latter. I know, it's a bit much, but a company that provides both security and investigative services has to have a name that stands out, that sounds reassuring. Justice is pretty much in the name, depending on how you say it."

He let his hand trail down the heavy waterproof yellow jacket with black stripes on the arms, then to the polyester pants, black with yellow stripes on the legs. The uniform looked vaguely constabulary, and for some reason it aroused him.

"I'm going to worry about you every night," he said.

"Don't. Most of my work will be patrolling otherwise empty sites, observing and reporting. If I encounter resistance, I call the police. If someone really gets in my business, I have pepper spray, and I still practice aikido, plus I have other holds I learned in my training."

"I guess you can't bring your sword with you?" Lauren's dad had given her the sword as a wedding gift, and she considered it the best present she'd ever received, because her grandfather had brought it home from the war and it meant a lot to her dad.

"Unfortunately, it's not considered part of the uniform, and I could be charged with excessive force if I used it on someone," she replied. "Maybe even assault with a deadly weapon."

He chuckled and asked, "What empty sites are you talking about?"

"You know, like your construction sites. You have security guards patrolling your sites after dark, right?"

"Yeah, true. Now that you're working for a company that provides them, it might be time for Johnny and me to switch companies."

"Don't do it on my account, but if they offer competitive rates it might be a good idea. They're up and coming, so they might be willing to undercut the big boys. If you do use us, though, it might be a good idea if I didn't get called to your sites, you know, because of conflict of interest."

Joe thought about that for a second. "I don't know what the big deal is, but okay."

"So, what do you think? Not too manly?" She spun around for him.

He shook his head. "I like it. Do you think you'll be able to work as a security guard if you're pregnant?"

She frowned at him. "Where did that come from? I'm still on the pill."

"I'm just asking generally. I'm not asking if you're pregnant now."

She shrugged. "Well, I don't plan on guarding forever, I'm aiming to move up into investigative work as soon as I can, once I get my P.I. license. Maybe then I might think about getting pregnant, depending on the amount of work I'd be doing."