Fragmented Rhapsody

Fragment 30

30
Burnham Park

"Thank you," mahina kong sabi habang inaabot ang bote ng tubig mula kay Octavian.

"You're welcome."

I can feel my cheeks burning up just by sitting across him. We're basically here at the same convenience store we first had our dinner together and we're sitting on the same table and chair we sat on before.

I can still clearly remember that one night – pareho kaming galing sa firing range ng araw na 'yun at sa kaniya ako sumabay pabalik ng SLU.

We weren't that close before when we first went here. At ngayong andirito ulit kami, para kaming bumalik sa dati dahil hindi na kami gaanong nag-uusap pagkatapos ng mga nangyari.

"Gusto mo pa ba?" tanong niya at saglit naman akong natigilan doon. We both locked our gazes and I instantly saw the panic on his eyes. " – ng noodles, I mean..."

I shook my head. "I'm already good...busog na ako."

"Bakit ka na busog?"

"Ha?" Kumunot ang aking noo.

"Kain ka pa," pagpupumilit niya. "You became thinner...kumakain ka ba sa tamang oras?"

"Kumakain naman," tipid kong tugon.

Tumango naman siya at nagpatuloy na sa pagkain. "Importante pa rin ang pagkain sa tamang oras."

"I know."

"But you're not doing it...nakikita kita sa school. You usually have your lunch now at 2:30 P.M. You're drinking a lot of coffee too in a day. You should watch out for your caffeine intake."

I became speechless. Hindi ko alam ang isasagot sa kaniyang sinabi. I didn't know he was watching me all along from afar. It gives me mixed feelings I cannot understand. Hindi ko naman siya parating nakikita sa mga pinupuntahan ko so it surprises me that he knows all about my eating routines.

"I'm trying to get back to my normal pacing," I said, "Rest assured I'm trying to fix my eating schedule."

"Take your time at 'wag mo rin biglain sarili mo. Little by little, just try to eat on time. If your stomach doesn't feel right, 'wag mong pilitin."

"Won't your girl be mad now that you're having a dinner with another girl?" I tried to sound as emotionless as possible.

Kanina ko pa itong gustong tanungin kahit pakiramdam ko'y wala namang karelasyon si Octavian ngayon. I knew it the moment he asked me a while ago – because if Octavian's in a relationship, asking other girls for dinner dates won't ever cross his mind. Never.

"Girl?" he said, brows furrowed. "Wala naman akong ibang babae...?"

I raised a brow at that. "Not sure?"

"I mean – wala akong babae," he said straightly and calmly, and fake coughing.

I silently smiled at the calmness of his voice. I usually see Octavian as someone wild and burning. But what he is tonight is very far from that image – he's just too gentle and kind. Even his eyes are shimmering with softness and peace.

Para rin akong inaalu sa tono ng kaniyang pagsasalita. This is the first time we had a proper conversation and I realized I also missed it a lot – days when the only thing that matters for the both of us is when we're able to express how much we want to take care of each other.

Saglit pa kaming kumain sa katahimikan bago namin naubos ang lahat. Kitang-kita ko rin mula sa aming pwesto ang kumpulan ng mga taong naglalakad sa Session Road dahil ito ay nakasara ngayong araw sa mga sasakyan.