01
Camaraderie
The moment you stop looking forward to the next attempt to succeed, that's when you become a failure.
I don't know how many papers I have already crumpled just to satisfy myself with the style of illustration that I want. Halos dalawang oras na ang nagdaan nang magsimula ako pero hanggang ngayon ay hindi ko pa rin makuha-kuha ang pinal na disensyo para sa aking plates.
The more time I spend on planning, the more my mind becomes fickle about it.
Bumuga ako ng isang malalim na hininga at dumungaw sa aking bintana.
The usual hazy outside of our house welcomed my eyes, but what relieved me a bit are the tiny rays of sun slicing through the mist. It's another cold day in Baguio and the sun's been covered by a layer of clouds.
Tumayo ako mula sa aking upuan at naglakad papalapit sa kama, hinayaang bumagsak ang katawan sa malambot na comforter. Staring right at my ceiling, I tried to conceal the monsters inside my head.
Para akong nasasakal sa kaisipang dapat palaging maganda ang resulta ng aking mga ginagawa.
It's like a constant reminder and an unspoken rule that I have been keeping since I was a kid – surely, there's always a room for error, but in my case, I must limit it just to one or two.
Isang katok mula sa labas ng aking kwarto ang naghudyat sa akin para tumayo at pagbuksan kung sino ito.
When I pulled my door to open, I was welcomed by Nanay Flores's smiling face. At this distance, I can already peek through her protruding white hairs. Wrinkles are starting to form around her forehead and caring eyes, and I could only wish time to slow down because she's becoming old.
"You're growing older. I don't like it," I commented, eyeing other changes.
Tumawa siya nang malamyos at hinawakan ang magkabila kong siko. "Ganoon talaga, Natalia. Sana makita pa kitang maging engineer tulad ng iyong Papa."
"Of course, you'd see me become one," I argued, even though I wasn't okay with the thought of her possibly missing it. She's the only mother figure I've come the closest growing up. Nandoon na siya simula pa ng pinanganak ako and she stayed with us up until now because she has no other family.
"Handa na ang hapag. Naghihintay na ang iyong Papa para kumain," she smiled at me and caressed my hair.
I pursed my lips and closed my eyes tightly before nodding.
When we arrived downstairs, Papa's already sitting in the dining and reading his daily newspaper. He curtly smiled at me when I noticed that he hasn't eaten yet.
"Good morning, Papa," I greeted and sat adjacent to him. Nilingon ko rin si Nanay Flores na naupo sa tapat ko.
"Good morning," he greeted back. "You have plans for today?"
Umiling ako. Wala naman akong plano ngayong araw na ito. Balak ko lang talagang tapusin ang mga plates na ilang oras ko nang sinusubukang gawin pero hindi ko talaga magawa-gawa ang final design.
"They're inviting you for a firing contest on Saturday," sabi niya at sumimsim sa kaniyang kape. He then looked at me as if expecting me to ask him questions, but I didn't.
"But I haven't tried shooting for almost a year now," marahan kong sagot pagkatapos ng ilang segundo. "I might not do well if I join the range this Saturday."
Hindi na ako gaanong nakakabisita sa firing range dahil combats trainings ang pinagkaabalahan kong recreational activity. Pakiramdam ko, nangalawang na ang abilidad kong humawak at magmaniubra ng baril – making me very unsuited to join a competition.
BINABASA MO ANG
Fragmented Rhapsody
Narrativa generaleWhen Natalia Alexandrine Dela Merced was born, it was a bittersweet grain of ends and beginnings - her mother couldn't survive due to certain health complications. She was raised prim and proper by her father, who has constantly expressed his civil...
