The Beauty of Winter. (Fanfic)

13

(Tw: potential triggering details in this chapter.)

Once again you were alone, travelling from planet to planet, but this time the pain of knowing you had finally found a home weighed in your chest. Drifting through space, it had been years since you left Earth now, but the pain was still just as strong.

You end up in a bar on Nidavellir, needing somewhere semi-familiar to stay for a bit, passing the time, flirting with whoever sat down next to you. You certainly weren't paying much attention, focused on drinking away your sorrows. A man sat down beside you, signalling down the bartender.
"I want a whiskey, and one of whatever the lady is having." You look up at him, biting your bottom lip, "thanks, but I'm not interested." You get up, heading towards the door.
"Wait, at least have the drink," he smiled, holding it out to you. You take it, chucking it back and swallowing it in one gulp.
"On second thought, I can do a couple more drinks." You sit back down, ordering another round.

After a few more drinks, you feel hazy and your mind feels as numb as your body. Finally escaping the pain. You turn round to grab money from your bag, hearing a commotion begin behind you. "What are you putting in that drink?" A voice booms, you don't dare to turn back round yet, your mind working slowly to process whats being said.
"The little lady let me buy her a drink, I was just adding some more... fun." You did turn back when you heard this, thinking of the numerous drinks you had taken off him, no questions asked. The room was still fuzzy, and you got up, stumbling towards the door. You feel a hand on your shoulder, without thinking, you turn around, swinging your fist into the man's face.

As you made contact, hearing a small crunch, your eyes widen as they meet a familiar pair that gazed back. "Thor..." you whisper, feeling your stomach churn and your hand throb.
"Y/n? Oh no, how much of that stuff have you had?" He grabbed your arm, guiding you to the bathroom. He leant you down, holding your hair back as he helped you throw up the contents of your stomach.
"It's okay, get it all out." He rubbed your back, helping you to stand afterwards.
"Would that have gotten any out of my system, it was all dissolved in drinks." You lean your back agains the wall, feeling the coolness of the tiles agains your skin. You close your eyes, momentarily as you feel Thor lift you up, walking outside and taking you both back to Asgard, leaving the usual pattern behind on the ground as you passed through the Bifrost.

When you wake up, you are back in your old room, on Asgard. You begin to panic, thinking you were trapped in another of your nightmares, pulling back the covers and running to the door. You swing it open, breathing heavily to hear your brothers coming down the hall. You duck round the corner, listening to them as they spoke.
"You're sure its y/n, out y/n?" Loki sounded sceptical, he sounded worn down by life.
"I'm positive Loki, its her." You hear them stop walking as they see your door open, the room empty. You slide down the wall as a wave of pain passes through your body.
"We need to find her." You hear Thor say before hearing his footsteps grow quieter as they got further away.
"It really is you." You look up at Loki, standing above you. He slides down next to you, holding your hand as he sees tears begin to prick your eyes.
"What happened?" He gestured to your other hand which was bandaged up.
"I punched Thor, hard..." you smile as Loki chuckles slightly, standing up and helping you up too. He pulled you in to a hug, holding you tight as if he never wanted to let you go again.

He walks you to the throne room, where your father sat, his angry expression wavering as he saw you.
"Everyone leave. Except for y/n." His demand was almost instantly fulfilled, everyone scuttling out, all except for Loki who stood by your side. You nod at him, letting go of his hand and watching him leave the room. As the doors shut, Odin stood, making his way towards you.
"Father, I know leaving was wrong, but it seemed like the best way to keep Thor and Loki safe. I was young and impulsive, I still am." He put his hand on the back of your head, placing a kiss on your forehead, you stop talking, letting the silence speak louder than any words would.
"You need to leave." Was all Odin said as he stepped away, concealing all emotions he felt, his face blank. You felt your heart sink. "I love you and I always will y/n but you you chose to leave. I spent years ending wars started over you and I am not prepared for these wars to return. You must leave in the morning."

You felt tears fall down your cheeks as all the surrounding noise dropped out, only the sound of your breathing remained. You opened the door, running past Loki, outside to the gardens, you kept running, till you reached a tree house, hidden away from anyone who passed by. You heard Loki call your name, as you ran, but you didn't look back.

You sat in the tree house, tilting your head back to try and stop the tears.
"What happened y/n?" You looked over to see Loki, climbing up to you.
"I have to leave, tomorrow. Father said I can't stay." You see his fists clench, knowing he is about to go find Odin, you stop him, "you can't say anything yet, especially not to Thor. I want to have one last fun night with you two." You sigh, heading back inside to get what you need for the night.