Certainty (A Bucky Barnes Fanfic)

━◦○◦1.4: Revelations◦○◦━

episode 1 - New World Order

Shamara could barely breathe. Fear wrapped around her chest, and she didn't know what to do. She stood in the center of the pool, chlorine sticking to her skin and hair. The pool lights waved through the water around her and Bucky. Who stared at her with a terrifying intensity. She should've kept quiet. He knew too much. Her heart throbbed as she tried to evaluate.

"Look," she met his suspicious gaze, taking her gamble. "I was taken when I was twelve. What I did or didn't do was nothing I could control. I escaped, but the more anyone knows about this, the more danger I am in. I can't tell you."

She inhaled and looked away again. She felt . . . exposed again, even more than when Bucky had asked her name that morning. More than she had in a long time. How did things fall apart this fast? I should've . . . I can't . . .

She wanted to dive through the water again, but it wouldn't help. She had made the mistake of speaking with him that morning, that afternoon, and had joined him in the pool. There was nothing to undo that.

"You were Hydra trained," Bucky's voice was low but softer.

She stiffened, "I just told you -."

"I was too."

Shamara stilled, panic overwhelming her. Metal arm . . . Hydra . . . She looked up, and Bucky heaved a sigh, stepping closer.

"You . . . you are . . . ," she was going to have a panic attack.

In a pool. With the frickin' -.

"I was. Was," Bucky's face tensed as he watched her.

The Winter Soldier. He was—had been?—the Winter Soldier. Shamara shook her head, staring at him.

"Why did you tell me? I didn't want to know. I even kept myself from looking you up. Why -?" She was shaking.

This is awful. A disaster. Why am I so foolish?

"Shay," he held his hands out. "Listen. I was -."

"I don't want to know! Do you know how much danger this puts me in? Two of us in the same building?"

"Hydra is gone."

"But Israel isn't! They had me for years after, and -," Shamara clapped her hands over her mouth when the lights flickered.

The pool lights stayed on, but the fluorescent ones on the ceiling shut off. Her heart pounded too fast, too overwhelming. For a moment, she missed her emotion-numbing drug. The dimness made her want to cower in a corner or run away. It shadowed Bucky's face.

"Angie must have assumed no one was in here," Bucky stared around the room.

Shamara's breathing came harsh and rapid. She kept her shaking hands over her mouth, looking around in panic. Her nails dug into her cheeks. Bucky faced her again. His face was still guarded, almost as if he expected her to swing a punch at him. Or a bullet. Who turned off the lights? Why now? What is happening! Her vision blurred as she stared at the water. She had tried to be so careful! But now everything was falling apart again, and she didn't know what to do -.

A cool hand touched her shoulder, "Shay."

Shamara shook her head, her eyes burning. She hugged herself and fought to calm her breathing. Bucky stood awkwardly before her, silent and unmoving, but Shamara didn't care. The main lights were off. She was in a pool with the man who had been the Winter Soldier, and she had no defenses. She inhaled a harsh breath, and Bucky echoed her. He shifted closer, and Shamara nearly jolted. He awkwardly—very awkwardly—moved his arms around her, patting her back. Shamara laughed in pure shock and nervousness.