Certainty (A Bucky Barnes Fanfic)

━◦○◦3.4: Kiss In Character◦○◦━

episode 3 - The Power Broker

Bucky's mind nearly went blank, and it took every ounce of his training not to react. What? He stared straight ahead, resisting the urge to look at Shamara, Zemo, or even Selby. His heartbeat quickened and made him forget about the sick feeling in his gut.

Kiss Shamara.

In any other situation, he wouldn't have been bothered. As anyone else, he would have accepted that it was just part of blending in. But not like this. He was the Winter Soldier again, even if his mind was his own. He felt used, unreal. He was a shell of himself, and that was the last time he wanted to kiss anyone. And especially not Shamara. Not when she finally trusted him as her friend. Not when she carried the same wounds he did--being used and losing autonomy.

"Highness," Sam said in Arabic with a look at Shamara.

Bucky risked a glance at her. She had pulled her phone from her abaya, her face impassive. But at Sam's word, she rolled her eyes and set her phone down. Selby laughed, lifting her eyebrows at Zemo.

"You are as tasteless as ever," he sighed, turning to Bucky.

Zemo minutely raised an eyebrow. Stay in character. Bucky didn't move. He didn't let his face move or his shoulders. Nothing. He was nothing again. A shadow, an obedient machine. Selby's information better be worth this.

"And not short either," Selby winked at Shamara. "I take no chances on a trick, Zemo."

"Conrad, what does she say?" Shamara sniffed, propping her chin in her hand. "She keeps looking at me like a cat with a mouse."

Her other hand gripped her phone, her only sign that she heard anything of the conversation. But what was that supposed to mean? Was she scared? Nervous? Maybe disgusted; she had watched him fight as the Winter Soldier now. And now he had to kiss her, unsure if it was all right with her. If she was scared or uncomfortable, and it made him feel sicker than fighting had. They were being made a spectacle for a criminal white woman. I'm sorry, Shamara.

Sam opened his mouth, but Selby held up a hand. She looked at Zemo expectantly.

"Soldier," Zemo heaved a tired sigh, speaking in Russian. "You heard her. Obey."

Bucky's hands tensed, but he willed himself not to react. He walked towards Shamara as slowly as he could. She kept looking at her phone, then stilled and looked up at him. The unease in her gaze nearly cut through him, and he had to remind himself that she was playing a part too.

"What did you tell him?" her voice shook as she narrowed her eyes at Zemo.

Selby laughed, and Bucky nearly tensed his jaw as he stood before Shamara. She didn't meet his gaze. Her hands trembled as she glanced at Selby. Bucky hoped she was what bothered Shamara the most. But if it is kissing me as . . . this, maybe I can let the facade fade some.

"Zemo -!" Shamara clenched one fist, sounding panicked.

Bucky nearly flinched, and he couldn't risk waiting longer.

He kissed Shamara. He kissed her, intending to let the kiss be all him and none of the Winter Soldier. Intending to let go of that nightmare just for the moment.

He didn't intend to be so strong.

A sharp gasp escaped her as he knocked her back against her chair. Bucky's stomach lurched, and he would have pulled back at once, but Shamara grasped his forearms. She squeezed his arms twice, and Bucky nearly sighed in relief. He moved closer. Her heat radiated through him, melting the fear and disgust knotted around his throat.