Certainty (A Bucky Barnes Fanfic)

━◦○◦3.5: A Couple Chats◦○◦━

episode 3 - The Power Broker

(warning: subtle references to past sexual harrassment/assult)

Shamara followed Sharon down the hallway, fading adrenaline making heat swamp her body. She tried to keep her hands still. But she couldn't.

"Guest rooms are there," Sharon gestured to a pair of doors. "When you finally get to sleep."

"Thank you," Shamara managed a smile.

Sharon made a humming sound, opening another door. She gestured Shamara inside the massive bedroom, just as fancy and tasteful as the rest of her house. Her bed sat on one side of the room, then a sitting area, then her vanity and closets. The color scheme was all various neutral colors like what Sharon wore.

"So," Sharon glanced at Shamara, opening her closet. "You and James a thing?"

Shamara's heart skipped a beat, but she shook her head. Sharon lifted an eyebrow. She took out an armful of clothes from the hangers.

"You sure?" Sharon gestured to a different option. "Because from what I saw . . ."

Shamara's throat tightened. She started looking through the dresses and skirts for one that would fit.

Bucky had been the one to kiss her, and the choice had ultimately been in his hands, but Shamara felt horrible. Like she had used him. She had kissed plenty of people on missions; that didn't bother her. But Bucky had been forced to live through his nightmares, fully conscious. And though he'd played his part well, she saw how it killed him to do it. Then he'd been forced to kiss her for a creepy lady who had looked at him and Sam in ways that made Shamara wish she could have killed her.

And even though the situation had been twisted, the kiss . . . Shamara had expected cold, detached, a Winter Soldier kiss. But it had been Bucky Barnes's defiance and strength to the core. He had let the walls fall for that moment, trusted her with himself. It had been his familiar, comforting cold, yet nothing about it had felt cold. It hadn't felt like he was forced into it at all.

He had let the Winter Soldier facade fade away for her, even as he kissed her because he had to be the Winter Soldier.

But he had been forced to it like he had been forced to do so many other things. And Shamara hated that.

"You were the sniper that killed Selby," Shamara held one of the dresses to herself, looking in the mirror.

"Don't expect me to confirm that," Sharon smiled, lifting one eyebrow.

Shamara sighed and shook her head, "Nothing between James and I. Unless it's required for work."

"Hmm," Sharon hesitated. " . . . it's tough to be in a relationship with a hero."

Shamara picked out a fancy jumpsuit but faced Sharon. The blonde woman sighed lightly, fussing with her black fitted shirt.

"Steve Rogers was dating my aunt before he went into the ice. She was heartbroken. Apparently, I learned nothing. He was . . . he was trying to be normal. He was a lot nicer than most guys in my career--many of them had betrayed me in the Shield-Hydra situation. So," Sharon scratched the back of her neck. "I allowed his advances, wanted to see where things would go."

"You helped James, Steve, and Sam get out of a fix," Shamara took the jumpsuit from the hanger and admired it.

It was black with a bold red rose embroidered on the fitted bodice. The bottom half was flowier but still elegant.

"Steve kissed me," Sharon kept her voice blank, even as she laughed. "I don't know if it was a weird thank you or a coping mechanism, but that's what he went with. Not gonna lie; it was great. Then he left. I never spoke to him again, even once the Blip began, and he was allowed out of hiding."