Ackerman's Steppes / Levi x Reader

Chapter 3: Smile or Die

"How are we feeling today?" you walk into captain's room a little excited. All nurses praised him and told you that he was very obedient. He seems to have gotten better. He is actually one of a few people that seem to withstand this disease.

"Fine. When can I leave?" he looks still tired but better. Maybe it's because he finally showered. All of that blood hid how naturally well-groomed he looks even in this kind of setting.

"Since we are not really sure about anything with this disease, I'll have you here for at least a week more. You also are one of the people that seem to get better, so you are a crucial point in finding out more about this disease," you answer with a hopeful smile on your face.

"What a bothersome. You understand that I am the captain of Survey Corps? I can't stay here as your test subject. I've had enough with the shitglasses already," he looks desperate and eager to leave. You can't let him yet as you aren't sure about his condition and feel obliged to make sure he will leave only when he is absolutely healthy.

"Well, anyway, I think it would be better for you to rest for at least a couple of days. You are not fully healed yet," you look at his wound on his shoulder. Now that he's clean you can actually see many battle scars as you suppose and fresh injuries. You feel some kind of empathy. He looks like he has been through hell. "You should let me treat that wound," you grip his hand to inspect it closer.

"How can I rest? My whole squad was slaughtered. You people don't understand anything about this world, frankly no one actually understands a damn thing," he looks disturbed and pulls away his hand. As if he remembered something tragic. You haven't seen such pain in anyone's eyes.

"None of this would happen, if you just stayed inside the walls. Why drive so many kids to their deaths?" you keep picking on him as a way to defend yourself from feeling guilty about not understanding why he is acting like this. You don't want to show how angry you are about Survey Corps accepting kids as their new recruits, but you also realize how devoted these people are. It must be something so important that it makes kid's sacrifices an agreeable price for it.

He stares at you. You know that you said something you shouldn't have. But you still can't cope with them not only risking theirs but also naïve young children's lives when they can just stay inside the walls safe and sound. But that look in his deep blue eyes makes you feel like you are the crazy one. You just tried to help him. After a few minutes of uncomfortable silence, you just walk out.

-

You decided to not work overtime. You need a break. You swiftly change clothes and leave the night for the nurses. This whole ordeal with captain got you conflicted about everything you believe in. You are still judgmental towards scouts but after seeing his pained eyes your feelings have mixed up. They are the ones risking their lives anyway...

Even though there are many people dying from the disease, some are starting to heal probably because of the new remedies you tried out this morning. You spent the whole night before mixing new herbs, you really need to sleep. But before that you decide to look through them again and take some notes on which ones should be the most efficient depending on which patients are feeling better.

"Stop being so loud. Someone is trying to sleep you know?" Lizzie comes next to you to see what you are doing. "Mixing herbs again? Why are you even keeping them in the bedroom?"

"Because barracks are cramped and only our bedroom has no windows. I don't want these herbs to sit in direct sun" you answer her focused on the leaves.

"You are one busy woman, aren't you?" Lizzie sights.

"Wait. He hasn't eaten anything today..." you phase out. Lizzie just stares at you for a second and goes back to her bed.