I'm not broken (RoyalChaos)

Chapter 14 - I can't let go of you

Ze's perspective

The door was shut and quiet came over the apartment. The TV was still on, and some horror movie was flashing over the screen. I sighed and unmuted it. I wasn't really in the mood for watching a movie, but I didn't have anything better to do at the moment. Anthony had left to visit Amber, Smarty and Galm were probably doing something together, just I was alone with nothing to do. Smarty and Galm. Just thinking about their happiness made me sad. Their relationship was so uncomplicated, not like mine and Anthony's. Everytime I saw them they looked so in love and so cheerful. And it was especially unfair cause nobody would've ever thought that Smarty could be gay. I mean, he always had a date with some new girl every other week. And now he settled down for a guy. My thoughts travelled back to Anthony. His suggestion that we'd take a break wasn't a bad one, but it sure hurt. His feelings were complicated, my feelings were complicated, our whole damn relationship was complicated. Thinking about what I had done with Wes I immediately felt terrible again. Weren't you supposed to just have eyes for your partner when you were in a relationship? Shouldn't other people be completely irrelevant to you? The killer in the movie had a girl trapped in a bathroom, and her terrified screams echoed through the apartment. I felt like screaming too. I had read somewhere that screaming would take away all of your stress and negative thoughts. Maybe that was true. I wouldn't know, I never tried it. Surely wasn't gonna do it now. The killer had now managed to get the bathroom door open. He was standing in front of the girl with a big kitchen knife in his hands, laughing at her cries. Who even killed people with a kitchen knife these days? I let out a rather depressed sounding chuckle and shook my head. Just as the killer dug his knife into the girl, making her scream her last scream, my phone rang and I nearly jumped out of my seat.

"H-Hello?", I hurried to answer and shut off the TV. My heart was pounding really fast right now.

"Steven?", a deep, husky voice questioned. Was that... It couldn't be... Right?

"Wesley?", I asked back, surprised to hear from the older guy.

"Umm, yeah", he said, "Look, please don't hang up on me, I just need one minute".

"Sure, go ahead". I sat up straight on the couch. What did Wes want from me after what had happened last night?

"I just... wanted to make sure you were alright", Wes started talking again, "I mean, you know. I wanted to know if... if you were doing okay..."

Why did he sound so nervous? "Y-yeah, I'm more or less fine", I answered him, "Why, what's going on?"

"Actually... Do you mind if I come over for a bit? I wanted to talk to you", he continued and hesitated as I didn't reply, "Don't worry, it's just talking".

I let him sit in silence for a while longer. Then I gave in. "Alright, just talking", I sighed, "You're in luck, Anthony's not here at the moment".

Wesley thanked me and hung up with the promise that he'd be here shortly. I put away my phone and got up from the couch. What was I even doing? Letting Wesley come over was probably the worst idea I had and if Anthony found out... Well, of course he wouldn't, he was at Amber's place right now and Wes would surely be gone before he came back. But still, this wasn't exactly the best idea. I shook my head again and walked over into the bathroom. I'd have to wash up a bit before I invited Wesley in. I didn't really want anyone to see me as horrible as I looked right now. Dark circles under the eyes, pale face, sad expression. I dug up a washcloth and made my face look a little less scary. After that I made my way into the bedroom, my eyes glancing over Anthony's clothes that were spread all over the floor. I groaned as I bent down to pick them up. If it was one thing that differentiated us, it was that he was rather messy and I was rather nitpicky. I opened the closet door and picked out an outfit for me to wear. It was basically what I wore every other day - some jeans and a shirt. Today's shirt was dark blue. I put it on and returned to the living room. I guess I'd wait until Wes arrived. I hopped back onto the couch, unlocked my phone and started to scroll through my saved pictures. There were a lot that I had made with Anthony. I looked at everyone of them, smiling at how incredibly happy we looked together. My sight got blurry under the tears that had welled up in my eyes and one of them dropped onto my screen, splattered right on my face. Sniffing loudly I wiped it off and blinked away the other tears. Relax, I thought to myself, It's only a break. You didn't split up and you're not going to. It's just a short little break and after that you'll be the happiest couple again. I didn't notice how much time I had spent staring at that one picture until the doorbell rang and I flinched. I sniffed one last time, swung myself off the couch and scurried over to the front door to open it for Wes.