Chapter 28

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Dean

The night is beautiful. Everyone is happy. And I'm just standing here basking in the calm and the loneliness. It's like they don't even see me. And I feel so much better than I do during the day. I haven't had anything to drink but it doesn't matter. I feel so, so good. Like the good part of caffeine, I feel alive and energized, and just content here. Watching everyone, feeling their energy flow through me.

"Hey Dean."

I whip around, surprised someone noticed me. They don't usually. Debbie is standing behind me, wearing a tight tank top and short shorts. She's drinking and looks unsteady. I take hold of her arm, not thinking, and feel the usual enormous rush of energy. I let go almost immediately but she winces anyway.

"Ow, what were you standing by the fire?" she asks, rubbing her arm.

"Um---yeah---I didn't know you went to these things," I stumble. I really didn't think she'd be here.

"Yeah, doesn't everyone? Oh my god I'm so drunk right now—and I don't even like wine," she says, dropping the cup absently then staring into the fire for a minute.

"Yeah, maybe you're good," I say, frowning a little. "What um—" why are you talking to me? You don't usually? I'm that weird kid who has three different dad figures show up to the school all the time? I'd really rather not be noticed right now. I hope I didn't hurt her. She seems fine now.

"Come here—dance with me, I love this song," she says. I can't even tell what song it is.

"What is it?" I ask, taking her soft little hands anyway, this time I'm careful not to hurt her. I don't know why I'm so warm. I didn't notice until now.

"Rhythm of the Night," she says, mouthing the words as she tugs me to dance with her. "Listen to it---I love it. I love this night."

"So do I ---really I don't---typically feel this good."

"Do you wanna have sex?"

"I don't think people say things like that," I say, choking because of course the answer is yes. "I---I've liked you for a long time."

"Well you didn't say anything," she says, tugging me close and putting a hand on my neck.

"No I thought it would be weird," since you never really talk to me that much and have a boyfriend who is tall and manly and tall and manly.

"Well let's get weird," she says, kissing me. If my dad has taught me anything, it's that if a woman in a committed relationship comes on to you you should absolutely go for it.

"Your call," I say, kissing her back. Her lips taste terrible of the dry wine she was drinking, and she giggles as I hold her in my arms. She's drunk. Very, very drunk.

"Let me walk you home," I say.

"No, I wanna fuck," she mumbles, leaning against my chest and pawing at my shirt.

"Well if you still feel the same way tomorrow night it's a date but you have had a lot to drink," I say, putting an arm around her shoulders, "Come on, let's get you home."

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