ethereal | park jimin | ✓

chapter 27 reality checks and balances

A pair of muddy green eyes haunt my slumber. The cruel nature of his voice echoes through my mind. The roughness of his shouting triggered my heart to skip beats. The desperation to escape, the tightness of my throat, and the sharp pain lancing through my body, all of these feelings rush back to me in the blackness of my dreams.

With a sharp inhale, my eyes snap open and my body jerks awake.

I stare at the pitch-black shadows of my bedroom, wide-eyed. It takes a few moments before my mind slowly returns to its normal state and I am able to remind myself that Sam isn't there. I grip my blankets tightly as if to remind myself that I'm not inside that terrible, metal cage. To remind me that I escaped and shouldn't dwell on those memories anymore.

I'm on the floor of my bedroom, safely tucked away in my apartment.

Yet this doesn't stop me from thinking about it.

Ever since I laid down, the terrifying thought of Sam somehow breaking out of police custody and coming after us is keeping me from sleeping peacefully. The image of him wandering down my street in the dead of night and peering into my bedroom window is too unsettling. I can't think about anything else.

I twist in my bundle of blankets and adjust my pillow. The hardness of the floor isn't so bad with the memory foam mattress I used back in the dorms. Not only that, I wasn't about to sleep in my bed when the boys deserved it more than I did.

I offered to sleep on my couch, but Jimin was adamant about keeping everybody together. He first suggested we all sleep in the living room together but I wanted them to sleep in a proper bed. Thus I was convinced to sleep near them as the three boys slept on my bed, all cuddled in each other's arms.

I suppress another rise of jealousy and remind myself firmly not to come between their relationship with each other. I have no right to intrude on that. Jimin is their brother first and foremost and I respect that. It doesn't help me feel any less lonely but that's a sacrifice I am willing to make for him.

I am not trying to be needy or clingy. I just miss his company. It feels different with Taehyung and Jungkook around. It's not a bad thing, of course, it's just... different.

I shake my head and remind myself that there are more important things for me to worry about. These three men are part of my life as "adoptees" whether Jimin thinks it's official or not. They are my responsibility. I am in charge of feeding them, making sure they have everything they need, and other things.

The world still treats hybrids differently than humans because most hybrids are born in a lab. Real hybrids aren't able to care for themselves on their own for a long period of time. They also usually require strong bonds with their caretakers to feel safe and protected. Though these boys were once human, they skipped out on an entire part of their lives and will have some difficulty rejoining society on their own.

It's my job to help them reach that point.

This all requires money I don't have, and money I won't have in the future. I know I told Taehyung about the extra funds coming but I have no idea when that will come. I have no idea how much either and if that amount triples or remains the same now that I have two more people in my house.

Not only that, I can't earn money from my job as I am being forced to take leave for medical reasons.

My head aches sharply as more worries rush into my mind. I groan quietly and gently rub the side of my head. Why does life have to be so complicated? Am I just overthinking things or not thinking things through enough?

I close my eyes again. I force my body to remain perfectly still, hoping I can fall back asleep. After what felt like forever, my eyes opened again to find the room still pitch black.