to the limit [{spencer x reader}]

chapter 10: the aftermath

warning: we got some greys spoilers and some depression type shit sorry

"is this the home of derek shepherd?" the police officer asked.

"yes, what happened?" merideth said.

"ma'am I'm going to need you to come with me." he said.

"t-the kids." she said to you.

the police officers let you take the kids in the car with you. you were in complete shock over what was happening. everything was a blur, next thing you know your in a hospital room staring at derek hooked up to a ventilator. nothing seemed clear, not the words mer was yelling, or the cries of bailey in your lap. you saw derek being taken off the vent and couldn't speak. you were in a haze of feelings that you didn't know how to respond to.

you made it back to the house and went straight for the couch.

"y/n i need you to leave." mer said out of no where. you didn't have to energy to protest, instead you just took your bag and left the house. you walked for a while because you were in the middle of the woods so an uber wont be able to come. you just kept walking.

"y/n? y/n?" someone said from the porch of dereks trailer but your body couldn't go near it. you just kept walking. you pulled out your phone and got an uber and made your way to the airport. you got your ticket and got on.

...

the uber pulled up to your apartment and when you walked up the stairs you just broke. you cried loudly, but tried your hardest to shove it back down for your neighbors sake but it just kept coming up. you cried in front of your door as you kept failing to unlock it. once you made it in you cried even more, you cried a loud, ugly cry. it hurt you that merideth had to go through this alone with her kids. before you knew it you were taking a plate out of the cabinet and throwing it at the ground. your anger kept building up and you kept throwing dishes. you were screaming things and crying as you threw them. you froze when spencer came through your door. you dropped to the ground and cried. he came over to you and let you cry in his arms. you stayed there for hours crying and mumbling things about derek. spencer stood there rubbing you back letting you cry it out. once you were done crying he brought you to your bed.

"can you stay?" you whispered. he nodded and took off his shoes. he went under to blanket and you snuggled up into his neck and drifted off into a dreamless sleep.
...
the groaning and loud ringing of spencers phone woke you up. you rolled off spencer as he answered the phone.

"mhm i'll tell y/n" he spoke into the phone.

you snuggled more into your blankets as he got off the bed. a coldness was greeted with his absence. next thing you know the covers were pulled off you.

"ah!" you screamed when the cold air met your body which was returned with a cackle coming from spencer.

"we have a case" he told you as you rubbed you eyes.

"mm" was all you could respond with. you walked out of your room only to be greeted with broken glass over the floor. you got your broom and dust pan and started sweeping.

"no let me do that, you go shower." spencer told you and gave you a look.

you walked to your bathroom and looked in the mirror. the person in the mirror looked totally different. your eyes were bloodshot and puffy, your skin pale, and the bags under your eyes are darker than ever. you looked away before you could spot anymore imperfections you stripped all your clothes and got into the shower. you washed your body carefully so you don't wet your hair. you brushed your teeth in the shower to save time and water.