Butterflies 🦋 chansung

Beginning of

Still, even after that, Chan never spoke with me again outside meetings.

He's my friend...

But it somehow hurts.

...

I think I like him.

Mom, I'm think i'm gay for him.

I think I am gay.

His kiss still lingers.

His smile.

His smell.

His hair.

That's what actually made me feel uncomfortable. It was actually me who felt lioe anxiety is gonna drown me.

I don't know what he thinks of me.

I wanted to know.

I need to know.

He's so good-looking and for what?

He's so nice and for what?

But isn't he like that to everyone?

You're not special, Han Jisung.

I clapped my hands on both of my cheeks.

Wake up, Han Jisung.

I looked away when he caught that girl who slipped in the hallway. The people squealed but I didn't know what has gotten to me and I just ran away.

He saw me and followed after me.

"Are you okay?

Oh, for fucks sake.

"Yeah, I'm okay. My stomach was just turning, I'm gonna poo." I shamelessly said.

He snorted.

"I got worried, you didn't seem fine. you look like someone made you upset?"

"..."

"Hannie, Did- Did I do something?"

"Not everything is aviut you, Hyung." I answered sounding more aggressive than I intend to.

"You we're a bit, uhm.. how do i say it." He stuttered.

"Are you mad at me?" He asked, unsure, you can see it in his eyes not knowing where to focus.

"No, why would you think so. Man, I gotta poo."

"Alright. Sorry" He hold out his laughter and I heard him sigh when I got in the stall. When I heard the door close and click. I sighed. If i could make a babknout of my sighs, i would be hella rich.

I let out a whimper of cries. Did you ever liked someone it just hurts to be around them? I want him. I did started avoiding him awhile ago, out of pettiness from being ignored, I kept rejecting his offers of help and kind of rebelled when ever being asked of something even if it's purely for the events and the officer stuff. I'm distancing myself. I'm changing.

I might seem weird.

Better to kill this stuff before it gets larger, I am not getting my hopes up. I don't even know, should I kiss a girl, maybe just to check if I feel something of sort? Is thisnhow people fall in love?