ʸᵒᵘ ˢᵃʸ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ⁱ ʷᵒⁿ'ᵗ ˡᵒˢᵉ ʸᵒᵘ
ᵇᵘᵗ ʸᵒᵘ ᶜᵃⁿ'ᵗ ᵖʳᵉᵈⁱᶜᵗ ᵗʰᵉ ᶠᵘᵗᵘʳᵉ
ˢᵒ, ʲᵘˢᵗ ʰᵒˡᵈ ᵒⁿ ˡⁱᵏᵉ ʸᵒᵘ ʷⁱˡˡ ⁿᵉᵛᵉʳ ˡᵉᵗ ᵍᵒ
ʸᵉᵃʰ, ⁱᶠ ʸᵒᵘ ᵉᵛᵉʳ ᵐᵒᵛᵉ ᵒⁿ ʷⁱᵗʰᵒᵘᵗ ᵐᵉ
ⁱ ⁿᵉᵉᵈ ᵗᵒ ᵐᵃᵏᵉ ˢᵘʳᵉ ʸᵒᵘ ᵏⁿᵒʷ
ᵗʰᵃᵗ ʸᵒᵘ ᵃʳᵉ ᵗʰᵉ ᵒⁿˡʸ ᵒⁿᵉ ⁱ'ˡˡ ᵉᵛᵉʳ ˡᵒᵛᵉ
(ⁱ ᵍᵒᵗᵗᵃ ᵗᵉˡˡ ʸᵃ, ᵍᵒᵗᵗᵃ ᵗᵉˡˡ ʸᵃ)
ʸᵉᵃʰ, ʸᵒᵘ, ⁱᶠ ⁱᵗ'ˢ ⁿᵒᵗ ʸᵒᵘ, ⁱᵗ'ˢ ⁿᵒᵗ ᵃⁿʸᵒⁿᵉ
(ⁱ ᵍᵒᵗᵗᵃ ᵗᵉˡˡ ʸᵃ, ᵍᵒᵗᵗᵃ ᵗᵉˡˡ ʸᵃ)
ˡᵒᵒᵏⁱⁿᵍ ᵇᵃᶜᵏ ᵒⁿ ᵐʸ ˡⁱᶠᵉ, ʸᵒᵘ'ʳᵉ ᵗʰᵉ ᵒⁿˡʸ ᵍᵒᵒᵈ ⁱ'ᵛᵉ ᵉᵛᵉʳ ᵈᵒⁿᵉ (ᵉᵛᵉʳ ᵈᵒⁿᵉ)
ʸᵉᵃʰ, ʸᵒᵘ, ⁱᶠ ⁱᵗ'ˢ ⁿᵒᵗ ʸᵒᵘ, ⁱᵗ'ˢ ⁿᵒᵗ ᵃⁿʸᵒⁿᵉ (ᵃⁿʸᵒⁿᵉ)
ⁿᵒᵗ ᵃⁿʸᵒⁿᵉ
ᵃⁿʸᵒⁿᵉ - ʲᵘˢᵗⁱⁿ ᵇⁱᵉᵇᵉʳ
Oᴍɴɪsᴄɪᴇɴᴛ
"I'm really sorry for what I put you through tonight" Alaina apologized to her unborn child as she rubbed her stomach. "It's not your fault your father ain't nun' but a lying cheating bastard"
She had tried to get some sleep and try to clear but she was up like an insomniac. No matter what position she tried, she just couldn't get comfortable on the big, cold, empty bed.
She hated to say it but she basically couldn't sleep without Wayne.
She was about to stand up to go get some water to drink when she heard the door. She was about to cuss Wayne the fuck out when she heard sniffling.
He was crying?
She pretended to be asleep as he shuffled around the room. Then she heard his voice.
It was raspy and cracked. Like he had been crying for hours.
"Hey lil one" he said, probably talking to the baby. "Your mum probably hates me right now. I fucked up big time tonight"
He fucked up more than big time. He was sure she'd never trust him again. Maybe he deserved it for all the lying and all the hurt and pain he had caused her. She didn't deserve any of this. She had been nothing but loving and supportive throughout their relationship and he just kept hurting her.
"She wants to leave me" he continued. "And ion blame her. Cause honestly, if I was in her shoes, I'd leave me too. I ain't shit"
He really wasn't. And he knew that. She always had high expectations of him and he didn't fail to disappoint her every time. Sometimes, it made him think what kind of father he would be. Would he be as much a deadbeat dad as he was a deadbeat boyfriend?
"What she doesn't understand is that she is a beautiful, educated, smart, charming, established, grown ass woman and any man, ANY, would be lucky to have her in his corner. She was in mine but I let my fucking insecurities get in the wa-" a sob escaped his lips as he bent over to place his face in his hands, trying to stop the tears from falling.
"We broke up when she first started modelling. Irreconcilable differences. But it really wasn't. I was scared. I was scared she was going to leave me for someone smarter. Someone richer. Someone taller. Someone better than I was. She had shown me nothing but a hundred percent loyalty from day one but I was still scared. I ended up projecting all my negative shit on her. I let all that shit mess with my head and I took it out on her. I regret my actions even up till this very moment. I wish I could take back everything I said"
Their New York saga wasn't something he was particularly proud of. He had just been selfish then. She had supported him in everything she wanted to do but when she finally wanted to make a name or something for herself, he didn't want that.
"When she left me, I broke lil man" he sobbed. "I was down bad. I started smoking a lot. Drinking all types of lean. Almost OD'd . I just couldn't seem to get my life together" he revealed.
"Then I met India at a club. I just wanted-" he paused to sob. "I just wanted to get that same fucking feeling I got when I was with your mum. I wanted so badly to feel it again. So badly to be loved again. I never once did"
"I swear on my mama and my dead homies that I never saw India again once your mum came back into my life. I tried telling her but she don't believe me. Frankly I wouldn't believe me too. I lied one too many goddamn times"
"Ion wanna lose her" he cried. "I know that's really selfish of me but I just can't. She's everything to me. Ion care about the money or the fame anymore. When I'm with her, I'm not Roddy ricch or anything, I'm just Wayne. Her Wayne. I wanna be that forever" he said.
Alaina had never actually seen Wayne CRY cry before and it tugged at her heartstrings. Here he was so raw and vulnerable and all she wanted to do was hug him. She could feel herself tearing up just hearing him talk like this.
"She's gonna leave me tomorrow" he continued. "I'm not gonna stop her. She deserves someone better than I am. I guess I really couldn't give her the good life she wanted"
He sniffled and let out a breath.
"Ight lil one. I should probably leave before your mum wakes up. I know she don't wanna see me at the moment".
He cleaned his tears as he stood up, careful not to make any loud noise that would wake Alaina up.
"Goodnight angel. I love you" he whispered before kissing Alaina on her forehead.
He was about to open the door and leave when she called out to him.
"Wayne?"
"Hm? Yeah I just came here to get a blanket. I'll be out in no time" he told her, not wanting to make her angrier than she already was.
"I can't sleep" she revealed. "Can you stay with me?"
"Are you su-"
"Yes please" she answered.
He wondered if she heard any of the things he had said but decided against it. She'd have probably cussed him out if she had heard him come into the room.
Slowly , he got under the covers and laid down, trying as much as possible not to make any body contact with her.
"Can you hold me please?" she asked. He hesitantly draped an arm over her and she instantly melted in his arms, burying her face in his chest.
"Wayne?" She called him again.
"Hmm?" He hummed in response.
"I love you too"
×××
okay iono, I was tryna make it sad but iono.
Don't forget to vote and comment
Thanks
not edited.
