archives

chapter 16

a/n:.

warning!!: this chapter has mentions of internalized homophobia and simulates an anxiety attack, please read with caution!
if you would like to skip over the internalized homophobia i recommend stopping at "In all honesty..." and picking back up at "I attempt...". as well as "We aren't.." and pick up at "He didn't speak...".

thank u, i hope u enjoy!

Nagito's POV

I wake up and feel my phone still in my hands. I probably forgot to put it away after talking with Hajime.

He seemed so calm about the incident, it's almost as if that was a somewhat normal occurrence for him. I wish I could say the same.

In all honesty, I didn't hate the feeling of him kissing me. But it was wrong. Boys weren't supposed to like boys. It's not a part of human nature, and Ive never had a boy kiss me like that before. These thoughts aren't normal. Am I sick or something?

I attempt to clear my thoughts by getting up and washing my face. It was Friday, the last day of the week which meant that I had to work tomorrow.

After washing my face and brushing my teeth, I jump a little at the 'ding' notification coming from my phone, which was still placed in my messy bed.

I hurried over and glanced down at my screen, I recognized Hajime's name and opened my phone immediately.

Hajime: Can you come over tonight?

I look at the text with a confused look on my face. I begin to type "Huh" until I remember what we spoke about last night. Me... coming over to his place again. Even after last time, he still wants me to come over.

Nagito: yea what time?

Hajime: 7 if that's alright with you :)

I thought it was a bit late, but I replied with yes anyway. It's not like I had anyone else to spend my time with.

Turning off my phone, I glanced at the time. It was around 10 am and my classes usually started earlier but I didn't feel like attending. These past few weeks have been so fun but yet confusing to me.

So instead of leaving my dorm as I always did, I simply stayed in and decided to clear my head.

For a couple of hours I cleaned, watched some television and studied. But throughout that entire time I was thinking about tonight. And then I started to think about what I was to Hajime. What was the relationship between us?

Are we dating? Close friends? Acquaintances? None of it made any sense to me. Every time I saw him I felt as if my entire body was unsure what to do. I struggled with my words around him, my palms became sweaty and I had trouble even looking at him.

I've never liked anyone romantically, let alone a guy. There's no way I could be gay... right...?

I placed my head in my hands, closing my eyes and letting out a long sigh. It wasn't normal for anyone to distract me as much as Hajime has. And I still don't understand what's so special about him.

Glancing at my phone, I see that it's around 5 pm. So I close my books and decide to take a shower and start getting ready early.

Hajime's POV

After finishing with my classes for the day and talking to some of my peers, I head back to my apartment. However I step by the grocery store beforehand making sure to pick up some ingredients in order to cook later tonight.