Dusk&Summer

19.

The teddy bear was a stupid idea. He had no idea why he had let his friends talk him into this one. It was a stupid stupid idea. Meredith wasn't that kind of girl. Meredith wouldn't like it at all and actually chances were she was going to freak out. He didn't even know if she felt anything for him. He didn't know if it was completely platonic on her end and he was about to destroy every weird thing they had been building.

Brian had said to go for it, but Brian was an idiot. Common knowledge. Brian Thompson was an idiot who was sleeping with his sister. Or planning for the future with his sister. Derek shouldn't have listened to him. It was a teddy bear. Meredith wasn't six anymore, she didn't need a teddy bear to protect her at night. Giving her a teddy bear was an awful idea.

She was going to think he was some weird creepy stalker. He felt like some weird creepy stalker. Just because Mr. Teddy had been one of her best friends when she had been little didn't mean she would want a new one. She was an adult now and probably would roll her eyes at it. And then laugh at him behind his back or something, crazy stalkerish Derek treating her like...he wasn't even sure.

This was stupid. It was stupid and insane and he should just hide the teddy bear under his bed or something. Meredith didn't want a teddy bear. She had kissed him. Kissed him and then used a line on him, that didn't give him the right to treat her like his girlfriend or something. She wasn't his girlfriend. And even though he badly wanted her to be, he couldn't push her.

He just had to stop avoiding this. That didn't actually mean buying her a teddy bear, it meant making sure she didn't spend days in a row not talking to her because she didn't want to admit to whatever this way. And it had to be something, he was sure that it had to be something, he just had no idea what. But that didn't mean pushing. He wouldn't push and suddenly the teddy bear was feeling like pushing.

He moved out of the car slowly, clutching the bag in his hands as Brian took out the zebra for Sophie. This was a bad idea. Sophie and Brian seemed to have some sort of agreement going on, they could do this. But he and Meredith...they had just kissed. That was all. And then she had used a line on him and ran. "You're giving it to her, Shep," Brian ordered, shoving the teddy bear into Derek's hands.

"I can't," Derek shook his head. "It's...I can't give it to her."

"You're giving it to her."

'No."

"You're giving it to her or I'll kick your ass."

"Why...why do you even care? She's just...she won't like it. She's going to think that I'm lame and stupid and...lame."

"And that's new to her?" Mark smirked, grabbing a load of groceries from the trunk.

"I can't...we're not even...we kissed once," Derek sighed, squeezing the teddy.

"Take the chance, Shep," Brian nodded, grinning when he saw the girls on the dock, resting on towels and giggling.

"I don't know if I can," Derek sighed, looking carefully at Meredith.

"You like her, go for it."

"I don't even know if she likes me."

"Just go for it," Brian groaned. "You good with the groceries, Sloan?"

"I've got them," Mark nodded. "Go be chicks with dicks." 5/19/2008

"At least we're not being turned down," Brian laughed, moving down towards the dock. Sophie and Meredith were lying on their stomachs, giggling as they stretched out. Derek couldn't help but notice Meredith's tan back, the way her spine curved as her blonde hair fell over her shoulders. She kept moving to push her hair forward, trying to give her shoulders sun, and his breath caught in his throat.