Mostly Roman Sanders oneshots{Requests open}

Hate me (Intense angst)

May or may not be a vent fic

Roman sits in his bed hands shaking, heart pounding, head spinning. In the past two days his resolve has crumbled completely and totally leaving nothing of him left. Having nobody outside his family to turn to he goes to Virgil. But sweet Despite only talking to his problems to Virgil sweet, wholesome, happy Patton saw through his facade.

So here he is hands shaking, heart pounding, head spinning. As Virgil joins the chat and insists that he needs help. The prince doesn't want them to help, he knows he needs help. In do many ways and areas he knows he needs help. He knows he must be a brave prince and help himself. He must be a strong prince and continue to support everyone because he is supposed to be okay.

Hands shaking, heart pounding, head spinning he just wants it to be over. He slowly turns on 'all caps' he doesn't want to do this. Or does he? He doesn't know anymore. A deep cruel twisted part of him, a part he thought he locked away for a long time has wanted his friends to hate him so maybes he does.

Hands shaking, heart pounding, head spinning Roman might throw up. He typed out probably the worst  and wrong message he could possibly send to people who just want to help him, want the best for him. People who love him unconditionally. He doesn't need help. He doesn't need support. Maybe he deserves this? Maybe who is he kidding? Roman definitely deserves this.

Hands shaking, heart pounding, head spinning, the message is sent. He might puke, his stomach is turning with guilt and shame as he changes his bio to 'not sorry' and puts is status in invisible. He is sorry he's so so so sorry. The outer part of him is longing to type something anything to make them know that he didn't mean it. He thinks about what will happen in the morning when everyone else sees what he said. More people who love him unconditionally will be gone. He wants to beg for forgiveness but something inside him restrained him. He did this to himself. He deserves the hate that will come. Hate him already!

Hands shaking, heart pounding, head spinning,  he knows one thing. He knows that nothing will be okay. He knows that trust has been broken and it shall not be mended. He knows that even if he's forgiven it wouldn't work. Trust is a fresh sheet of paper. Once is crumpled you can try to smooth it out at again but it will never ever be the same no matter how much you try. No matter how much time or effort you put into that piece of paper trying to restore it. It will never be the same. It must be replaced. Roman must be replaced.

Hands shaking, heart pounding, head spinning, feeling ill he mutters "Hate me." As he goes into a dreamless slumber regret embedded into his chest.

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