Cameron Monaghan imagines

broken (part 1)- ian gallagher

today it's been one month ago since he and I broke up. he really hurt me.

as I walk into the school building after 8 weeks of summer break I get this really scared feeling. scared of seeing him again today.

i walk to my locker and put my jacket in it. when I suddenly hear some boys yelling, I see him walking into the school with his arm around another girl.

well... another girl? more like the girl with who he cheated on me with last month.

I close my locker and walk to my spanish classroom. A few seats are already taken. I take a seat in the back row. When almost every seat is taken there's an empty seat next to me. shit... ian hasn't come yet and I know he has to sit next to me. he's probably making out with her on the toilets. with this thought, I roll my eyes and push his table a little away from mine so we won't sit that close next to each other.

the lesson is about to start and there he is. unfortunately, he's on time. I see him searching for an empty seat and he found the one next to mine. we have eye contact for a second but I immediately look away. he walks to his seat and sits down.

I look outside and feel his eyes on me from behind.

after a while, he talks to me.

'y/n...' he says. We look each other in the eyes.

'can I...- can I borrow a pencil?' he asks.

I grab a pencil out of my bag and give it to him.

'thanks.' he says.

***

the school day passed by really fast. I go to my locker to grab my jacket and walk out of the building. as I walk over to the parking lot I see them.

ian with his new girlfriend.

they're leaning on her car while they're kissing, his hands on her ass. ugh, disgusting.

I honestly can't believe he cheated on me. And I also don't understand why. we had so much fun together, I really loved him and it also looked like he really loved me. he was so sweet, caring, and gentle with me. we spent so many nights together and I always was there for him when he needed me. and then realizing I lost my virginity to him. gross.

but everything changed since last month...

I came to his house and that was the point where my heart broke into million pieces.

It looked like he didn't even care about me. he didn't even call me that evening and he never apologized to me after that gross kiss with that bitch.

I realize now that I'm staring at them kissing. my thoughts were somewhere else.

'what are you looking at?' ian says.

I look behind to see if he's really talking to me or someone else.

'I'm talking to you, you dumbass.' he says. damn. first cheating on me, now calling me a "dumbass". he changed a lot over the past few months.

'dumbass?' I yell angry back while I walk in their direction.

'I think the only dumbass here is you! you're the one who cheated on me with her!' I say with so much anger in my voice. I feel the tears already coming up.

'can you just go away now?' she asks annoyed. I look for a few seconds in her eyes.

I actually want to slap them both so hard and bring them into the hospital, but I keep my anger inside me. after I give her the "bitch-face" I walk away from them.

I'm so fucking mad at him. I wanna slap him in the face but at the same fucking time, I wanna hug him so tight. I miss him. and I know my feelings for him are still there.

he just broke me in pieces.