My Improbable Theories On Her.

22. Hysteria.

I looked at my reflection in the full-length mirror in front of me for the nth time.
I think I should just stop overthinking.

I looked skeptically at the boy in front of me who wore a black t-shirt and track pants.
Was it a little too casual?

I clicked my tongue irritatingly and went back to my cupboard. I selected a pair of faded jeans and a formal shirt which I could wear atop the current tshirt.
I shimmied my way into the jeans, which were a little too tight (the jeans are shrinking, I am not fat, bhupp!)
And yet again, I looked into the mirror.

Okay, now was this a little too formal?
Ugh!
I wanted to pull out all my hair but quickly decided against it. Some things should be left for old age to act upon.

A slight chuckle came out of my mouth on my own lame joke.

After about 20 minutes, I decided upon the black t-shirt, on top of which, was the opened checkered shirt, and my usual khakhi bermuda.

I face-palmed.
Jab har baar ka outfit hee pehen-na tha toh itna time matha kyu phhoda?

I shook my head at my own stupidity and looked at the wall clock.
10:55 p.m.
Shit, shit, shit.

In not more than 10 minutes, I am going to meet her.
Finally.
After almost 10 freaking months of staying in the constant mystery that she is.

I took my phone and turned off the lights, then exited my bedroom while taking care that the pinky finger of my foot does not crash horribly with the edge of the dinning table like it usually does and wake up the whole of Faridabad with my screams.

I had to sneak out, obviously, because my parents won't allow.
Like, what the hell did my parents think? That I won't be able to take care of myself at such a late hour of the night and get involuntarily and forcefully involved in a scandal, in which I will be unnecessarily blamed without any fault of mine?
What did they think I was? Any other stupid girl who's always 'asking for it'?

I shook my head and kicked myself from the inside.
Shh, Ajey, calm your mind, that joke was so dark.
Even darker than-
Nope!
Nopety nopety nope nope!
Don't even complete that dark thought, Ajey, you a-sanskaari, little bastard!
Not cracking another dark joke while justifying the previous one!
Most of the times, I am so glad that people can't hear my thoughts.
If they could, I would have been banned long ago.

I opened the latchkey of the main door ever so slowly, when suddenly the lights of the living room were switched on.
It took a second for my eyes to adapt to the sudden light and also to figure out who did it.

"Yes? Where are you off to?", Maa asked with her hands up in question.
"Umm... actually...uhh, it's my friend...uhh...he, arey I mean, she needs me. Shit, I mean she needs my help, not me. Why would anyone want me? Hehe. Yeah, only help.", I stuttered and started playing with the key in my hand to cover up the awkwardness.

I screwed up big time.
No doubt in that.

"Achha? Aesa kya? At this time?", she said accusingly as her eyes scanned the wall clock.

"I...uhh...haan woh na...", I stuttered yet again.
I clicked my tongue.
There's no point in keeping it a secret anymore.
She will know by my awkwardness even if she doesn't know anything.

"Okay, so listen to me carefully, okay? There's this...this online friend of mine for like, I guess around 10 months? Yeah, dus mahine toh honge. Haan so, she isn't actually 'online' as such, because she studies in my school only and-"

"KissMyAxe?", she asked.

I whipped my head at her.
Wait a minute, how did she even-

I guess the shock was pretty evident from my face because she 'tsk'ed slightly and said, "Yash ne mereko bataya tha. But I only know that you both are friends and all. Aage kya?", she said impatiently.