Agents (Bucky Barnes x Reader)

Chapter 14: Fall

Soldier chased after you, “hey what was that?” he said finally reaching you and pulling your arm to face him. 

“What Soldier, I did my job,” you responded, for some reason your heart hurt and you were trying to hold back a sob.  Soldier noticed and pulled you around a corner away from everyone else. 

“Come on, talk to me,” he whispered holding you to his chest. 

“I didn’t want to do that, why did I let them kill all those people,” you finally let out the small sob you had been holding in and lean all your weight on soldier. 

“I know, I know,” he whispered stroking your hair. 

“Shadow?” You heard Rumlow’s voice coming around the corner and refused to allow him to see you like this.  Soldier pushed you behind him shielding your body as you wiped your face and gained your composure. 

Rumlow turned the corner, “where’s shadow?” he asked.

“You have a lot of nerve coming to talk to her Rumlow,” Soldier responded.

“I followed her order, I’m sure she can stomach it,” he responded arrogantly. 

“You killed those men Rumlow,” you yelled at him coming out from behind Soldier, “you can’t control your men to keep their mouths shut and those people had to die because of you.”

Rumlow looked shocked but said nothing.  “Get out of here, you’re suspended from command and your men will now look to your second,” you explained to him crossing your arms. 

He tried to protest but you held up your hand, “and you can explain it to them yourself and then I want you on the next truck out of here understood?”

“Yes mam,” he responded turning on his heels and walking away.  There was malice in his voice and you knew it would not be the end of this. 

As soon as he was out of sight you turned back around and fell into Soldier’s embrace again chocking out a few sobs that you were holding back.  Unfortunately this was not over, there would be nightmares for years and more hell to pay back at Hydra command.  

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You made it back to Hydra command with the rest of the strike team and Soldier.  You immediately were taken to the command deck for a mission report, but you and Soldier were not alone this time, Rumlow decided to tag along. 

“I’m going to tell them what you did Rumlow,” Soldier said menacingly walking in between us. 

“I followed Shadow’s orders, maybe you should tell them that,” Rumlow said, “funny thing is though, I don’t blame Shadow, I blame you for making her soft, unfortunately she’ll have to pay for it not you.” 

“Enough Rumlow,” you said irritated. 

“She wouldn’t have needed to give the order if your men understood what quiet meant,” Soldier continued, unwilling to let it go. 

“When have civilian lives ever mattered to you Soldier?” Rumlow retorted. 

“Enough, both of you,” you replied, your voice getting angrier the closer you got to the command center. 

“Come on Shadow, you know you are going soft,” Rumlow said trying to look at you through Soldier’s body, only he continued to shield you.  You and Soldier stopped abruptly at the entrance of the command center, but Rumlow wasn’t paying attention and almost ran right into the commander. 

Rumlow bowed his head, “my apologies commander, I should pay more attention to where I am going.”

Commander ignored his statements, “I would hope that if you were accusing my best team of softness, that you would have some concrete proof, Rumlow,” he said gesturing for all three of you to stand around the hologram. 

“I do, sir,” Rumlow responded still bowing his head. 

“Then we can talk later, for now leave us,” Commander said to Rumlow dismissing him.  Without missing a beat commander continued, “mission report.”

“Sir we extracted the technology as instructed and delivered it to you before returning to the building and helping with clean up,” Soldier explained with a straight face. 

“Upon arrival Strike team had it pretty much wrapped up except for a group of workers that they kept in the lab’s warehouse.  When I interviewed those remaining it became clear to me that they knew we were Hydra, so I ordered strike team to eliminate them,” you explained wrapping up.  You knew you were only to give the basics of the mission, and Commander would ask questions if he needed more information. 

Commander just nodded at you, “and why does Rumlow think you have gone soft Shadow?” he asked.  Soldier opened his mouth to speak, but Commander held his hand up to silence him. 

You looked down at your feet thinking, then you knew to just tell him the truth and to not be ashamed of it.  You looked commander directly in the eye, “Rumlow has not kept his men quiet, while I was interviewing the survivors one of them disclosed that Rumlows men had mentioned they were Hydra, a thing I know we are never supposed to talk about.  I ordered the civilians to be killed because of what they knew, but I felt it would not have been necessary had Rumlow and his men kept their mouths closed.” you explained confidently.  “Rumlow is likely referring to when he caught me having a moment with Soldier, I was temporarily upset by what needed to be done and Soldier was graciously talking me through it.  We went to a private location so the others would not see this moment of weakness from a superior, but Rumlow decided to follow us instead of following orders,” you finally finished allowing commander to process it all. 

He was quiet for a moment, “I see,” he said, “in all your years of service, you have never had a moment of weakness, why have you now?”

“With all do respect sir, I have had a few times where I question my orders, but I usually deal with it privately and quickly, I have never let it affect my preceding missions,” you respond. 

Commander scratched his chin before looking at you again, “I will speak with Rumlow and understand the incident, but I see no evidence that you did not do your duty.”  He then turned to Soldier as well, “both of your retire to your quarters, and we will discuss the next mission when it comes time.” 

You both nodded to commander and walked to your rooms.  Without saying a word Soldier grabbed your shoulders and pulled you into his room and opened the door, letting you in.  You walked right over to his bed and collapsed from the stress.  You felt so mentally and physically exhausted that the only thing you wanted was sleep.

Soldier understood and didn’t say a word as he helped you out of your armor and leather jacket.  He was lifting up your shirt when he noticed all of the blue and purple bruises covering your body. 

“Shadow when did these happen?” Soldier asked you. 

You looked down, “I hadn’t even noticed, probably from fighting the swat team,” you responded not even looking at him. 

He grabbed you face in his hands, “Shadow hey, look at me.” 

You eyes slowly fell on his, “Shadow what’s going on with you?” he asked but you just stared straight through his eyes.  “Shadow?” he was yelling now but you could not hear him. 

“Shadow, shadow?” Soldier was yelling so loud people in the hall started to notice, but you could barely hear him as your eyes refused to focus on anything. 

“Hang on Shadow, hang on,” you started to see black in your vision until it took over everything.  You thought you could hear Soldier’s voice still, but it was like a whisper, “don’t leave me.”