The Killers Freedom

Chapter Seventeen: I Felt Powerful

Joseph and I had our dinner last night and Elaine helped me get ready. She picked out one of my favorite dresses, a coral floor length dress. It was off the shoulder with a delicate sweetheart neckline and had a slit opening up one of the legs, the signature for the dressmaker that Stryker would use was stitched in gold where the tag would be.

She did my hair up in a bun and pulled a few strands down to frame my face. Light makeup was applied and I got to go out as myself. My natural, beautiful self. No fake noses, no wigs, no contouring to hide my natural features and give me different ones. I was just staring back at me.

I'm not sure the last time I was able to dress up and look like me. It was always for an assignment or to meet with Strykers potential clients and even then I would have to hide myself. It had felt strange, but a weirdly good strange to dress like this.

He had taken me to a beautiful restaurant in the heart of the city. We sat on the rooftop and had a table that overlooked the most beautiful buildings I've ever laid eyes on.

The entire night he couldn't keep his eyes off of me. And as much as I enjoyed the compliments, after all this time it felt so natural. Like there was a pull from the both of us to one another I could never doubt that. As much as I wanted to continue to hate him and suppress every feeling I have ever had for him, I could feel them inching their way back into my heart.

Peace overtook me last night. For once I was looking at the world through my own eyes. Not the eyes of Stryker and not the eyes of the person I had to be that night. But myself. It was amazing to laugh and joke and talk about our time we spent together so long ago. He told me all about his life here, how he became successful and every now and then he would apologize for everything I went through. I liked this side of him.

Once dinner was done and we were home I made my way up to my room soon realizing I had forgotten to thank him for the wonderful evening we spent together. I decided to shower first and then begin the journey to find him, hoping he wouldn't be sleeping by the time I was done. Slipping on a knitted sweater and a pair of black leggings I began the search around this massive house.

After what felt like an hour of opening and closing every door I could find I began to give up. Where was everyone? There were so many empty rooms in this house yet not a single soul to be heard. I was sure I had stumbled across his room at one point. The one two doors down from mine was huge. The middle of the room held a king size bed covered with a silky looking deep red comforter and the walls were painted a shade of cream. It looked lived in due to the desk that sat against one wall and had papers spread around it. There was a couch and lounge chair on another wall and the small table in front held two small glasses and a bottle of whisky. It had to be his room. But he was nowhere to be seen.

I decided to make myself a cup of tea hoping to bump into someone along the way when I heard people talking.

"You are not taking her there, end of story, Elaine!"

I heard slamming coming from the back of the house where the patio was and I made my way to the sliding glass door to see what was going on. It sounded like Joseph was screaming.

I stopped and watched them from the shadow I lurked in. Wanting to know exactly what he was so worked up about.

"Joseph calm down it's one night and she deserves this," Elaine was sitting in a chair wrapped in a small blanket looking completely not phased by his outburst, like this happens all the time and she is used to it, "I doubt she's ever been to a club to have actual fun and not on an assignment. You know exactly what that was like when you were done with training. You've even told me yourself you were a pig and would go out almost every night to get in bed with some new conquest. For God's sake Joseph, you were still sleeping around until two months ago! So don't bark in my face about how she cant go out. What are you? Her boyfriend? All I'm saying is she deserves one night of fun, to let loose."

"That's exactly why I'm saying no, Elaine, she doesn't need some random disgusting guy grabbing all over her! Just the thought of that makes my blood boil" He hadn't calmed down, if anything she just made him worse. Elaine and I have had this planned and from what I'm concerned I don't belong to him. I can take plenty of care of myself.

"Listen," Elaine's voice was calm and collected, almost mocking him at this point, "her entire life she was trained to kill. She has been mentally hardwired to not take shit from anyone. What makes you think, in that dense ass skull of yours, that she would let someone take advantage of her? Please, I will wait for an explanation because if I'm being honest, going with her tomorrow night will be the safest thing I've done in my life. You need to chill because your jealousy is starting to show and it's not pretty."

I could see the pain and confusion dripping from his face. He knew she was right, I wasn't trying to go and hook up with random guys. But her calling him out for being jealous has me puzzled. I simply wanted a night out, an actual girls night out for the first time in my life. And yet here he is trying to put a stop to this. Because he's jealous?

Before I could tell my body to stop I was sliding open the glass door and had two sets of eyes on me, looking guilty that they were caught talking about me.

"I uhm, I thought you would have gone to bed by now," Joseph stuttered out rubbing the back of his neck with his hand, making sure to not make eye contact with me looking at the ground.

"Actually I felt bad that I never got the chance to thank you for this evening, but apparently you need to involve me in this conversation you two are having."

I pointed to them both and took a seat next to Elaine, being sure to get under the blanket she opened up and welcomed me in. I stared hard at him. Waiting for him to speak.

"Bugs, I just don't think it will be the safest thing for you to go, being your first outing and all maybe I should come with? Keep an eye on you all and make sure you're okay."

I could feel myself getting hotter by the second so I stood up and walked over to him. Standing directly in front of him without so much as a hairs distance between our bodies I raised my pointer finger and dug it into his chest.

"Listen. It's been sixteen years that I have done nothing but be told what to do and how to do it. You forget something, Joseph, I was the one who became the best. I was the one who took down some of the impossible assignments. I was the one who woke up everyday with only one thing in mind because it was burned into me. You, you ran here to fucking Moscow to escape all of that while I stayed and became better at killing every single day. I will not stand here and be told that I hold my freedom that you so graciously bought back for me, yet be limited to where I go, who I talk to and what I do all because you think it's unsafe. Do you want to know what's unsafe? You're pissing me off, that's what. You're going to give me one simple yes or no answer right now and what you say will determine everything I do after. Are you going to stop me from going tomorrow?"

I felt powerful. Like I just got on a high and I could slay all my demons right here and now. But I could see the conflict in his face. The little lines on his forehead wrinkled as he looked at me. We both knew he wanted to say no, something inside of him wanted to restrict me to this house but I couldn't figure him out yet.

"You may go."

With those words he turned and walked away. In the back of my head I knew I wouldn't see him for a few days because he's going to do the same thing he's always done and shut himself off to everyone to pout. I didn't care though, I won. 

*************

Thoughts on if Bugs will actually go out?

Will Joseph try to stop her or let her go without an issue?

Please remember to like, comment and vote! It means so much to me when you all do!

-H