Suffer

Who?

I had no sense of direction. I only had one thing in mind, getting my ass to class before receiving detention. Entering my English classroom I was greeted with the face of the best teacher in the whole school. Miss Elliot, she was a kind-hearted, selfless teacher. She was one of those teachers who saw the good in everyone. She even saw the good in me. She saw the real me. Not the me that people whispered rumors about but the true me. I could easily talk to her about anything without being judged. She was truly a gift from God, if only she was related to me. I know I would never fear when my next meal was or if I would have a roof to live under. She would have taken the best care of me.

"If only..." I sighed.

"If only what Raven?" Someone answered me.

Startled and looked up to face my teacher. She had the brightest smile on her face as she walked over to me.

"Are you okay sweetheart?" She questioned concerned.

"Yeah, I'm fine" I smile back.

Genuinely concerned she walked closer to me. "I haven't seen you in a little while. What have you been up to?"

"I've been... busy" I answered unsure how to respond.

"But don't worry I'll be in class more" I quickly reassured her.

Giving me one more glance she walked back to her desk.

"That's good to hear sweetheart long as you can get a good education and stay safe that's all that matters".

"Yeah..." I whispered.

"Actually can you...?" I started to say stopping midway.

"Can I what? she quickly answer me. Is there anything I can do for you?" She questioned.

"Can you tell me what's going on?" I asked.

"Oh, do you want me to tell you what you missed?" she asked almost too cheerfully.

"Y-yeah, that would be great, if that isn't a problem" I answered nervously.

"Oh don't worry about a thing Raven. I've got you covered. Here!" She said handing me a folder.

"This is everything you've missed and I've taken a few extra notes for you. I just hope you can be here with us more often. And don't worry I know these past weeks have been hard for you especially near the end of school. I don't want you to feel any pressure when taking your finals so I came up with a little system for you just read these papers in the folder and you'll be fine". She said reassuring me.

For the first time in a while, I actually smile. A real smile.

"Wow" I replied astonished.

"You didn't have to do this".

"No no Raven, I care for all my students and you are one of my students so I have to make sure you are doing good in school and doing the best you can. I wanna see you succeed and if I have to pitch in a little bit for your success then that's what I will do".

I lowered my head as a single tear rolled down my face. I couldn't remember the last time somebody cared this much for me or even care at all if I succeeded or failed. It was all so strange. I didn't understand how some people could live so carefree, so kind, so selfless. I've always try to survive on my own thinking about myself first yet this woman...no my teacher cared so much for my well-being than anybody else. She hardly knew me, just as a student yet she was making sure I succeeded, and if I felt safe. But why? I guess because I didn't understand why I didn't truly understand people. In a world of my own, I didn't hear as the bell rang as more students entered the classroom. Class had officially started. My eyes shifted to land on Miss Elliot as she began writing something on the chalkboard. She paused to had a pile of papers handing it for Violet to pass around. A large blank space with one simple question stared back at me.

How would you describe yourself?

"Alright, today class" Miss Elliot began. " We are going to do a really simple assignment. We are near the end of the year so I didn't want to start teaching something new so I just wanted to know a little bit about all of you. How would you describe yourself and what do you see yourself doing after graduating? Do your best you're not going to be graded on accuracy just write something down about yourself, it doesn't have to be complicated and you can simply get an A. Any questions?

The room was silent as a few coughs could be heard from the back of the class.

"Okay you may begin and when you're finished you can go on your phones. I don't have any other things planned." She told us walking back to her desk.

Everyone in class was cheering as she said we could go on our phones. Feeling like an hour had passed I hadn't written a single word down. I was stuck. I wasn't sure what to write. If she had given us a topic to write, this assignment wouldn't be a problem for me but having to write about myself, now that was a whole different story. Finally, one word came to me, depressed. As I was about to write that single word, a loud alarm went off. The fire alarm was blaring but there weren't any fire drills scheduled for this week at least we weren't told.

"Everybody make a straight line and head outside," Miss Elliot told us with concern plastered all over her face.

We followed as she counted to see how many people were left in the classroom.

"Where is Mike? she asked worriedly.

"I think he went to the bathroom" a girl answered.

"Okay all of you meet outside, I am going to go look for Mike".

We all left the classroom taking our usual route when we had fire drills out the building. Ten minutes had passed we were all scattered around in a pile waiting for our teacher. Eventually, we found her, she had Mike trailing right behind her.

"Is everybody here?" she questioned us as she started calling names.

"Ellie are you here?"

"Here!"

"Marissa?"

"Here!"

"Dylan?"

"Here!"

"Chris?"

"Here!"

"Raven?"

No answer.

"Raven...?"

I felt a tap on my shoulder. I looked up.

"Miss Elliot is calling you," she told me

"Oh I'm right here," I said shyly.

She began saying other names of students acknowledge their presence.

"Hey teach do you know why we're here?" someone spoke up.

I looked up to see who asked the teacher that question that's when I saw Rose. Everything stopped altogether as I stared at her. Rose was there but someone... I pushed someone but Rose was there! Who did... I push on top of the roof?

"Well, students... very sad news" Miss Elliot began. "Us teachers sere all just told a student had died jumping over the edge of the roof. Nobody saw them jump but the police are investigating they think it's a suicide".

I felt sick to my stomach. Who was she talking about? Who jumped over the roof? So many questions were running through my brain.

"Miss Elliot.. does the people who the person is..?" I asked anxiously.

"Why do you want to know who they are?" Rosed laughed as a bunch of girls laughed along with her.

"Now now girls no need to be mean Raven's asked an important question. No Raven so far we don't know who they are but we do know he had jumped over the roof earlier this morning and nobody noticed until now one of the students noticed the principal. We're all outside to make sure that there's no criminal in the building so just taking safety precautions until all of this is over. The student will be identified soon" She told us.

I felt dizzy. I felt nauseous. Who was it even? If they knew who it was but didn't want us to know, I wasn't sure but I did know one thing. I didn't want to know.