Sentry of The Wounded Heart

PROLOGUE

As the cold wind blew my numb bare shoulders, in which it experienced a lot of cold hazed season in Koninkrijk der Nederlanden, suddenly an unwelcome thought came in like a lethal injustice to justify: no matter how many countless colds I had been through in the past 7 years, the breeze of the place I used to live can still shiver my spine.

The cold has been my comfort weather. However, this cold I have felt scares me for some terrible reasons.

The irony of my life is inevitable. Ang lugar na dating lugar na nagbibigay sa akin ng saya at ginhawa, ngayon ay isang nang lugar na binubuhay ang takot sa aking puso at ang rason ng paninikip ng aking dibdib sa malalim na dahilan.

Sadly, my comfort zone turned into the most disturbing place of discomfort I have ever been.

As we traveled along the wide road of the City of Love, I can still clearly remember the memorable good memories that happened way back when I was young:

It was filled with youthful happiness. There was freedom, although I was too tied to the responsibilities of being a dedicated student and an obedient daughter. There was peace despite the nosy chaos that surrounded me.

Then... There was love.

But that was before, when things were not yet worse and unforgivable.

Andami nang nangyari, andaming magagandang alalala, pero mas nananaig ang sakit ng nakaraan.

Now, every place in this city feels like a hidden unbinding of the painful past; once the stitch has been triggered, the wound will open again, and it cannot be undone. The pain it causes is triple that of the things he had done before, and it hurts like an open, deep wound you are forced to aid with alcohol.

All these things happened in just one blink of an eye—literally, in one blink of my own eye. Our eyes are made for us to be able to see the beautiful things in the world, but we forget to see the bad things that happen in this world. I was a victim of that. I was blinded by false kindness.

However, if it's the welcome greeting of my dearest homeland, I will surely be honored by the fear and doubts that I know will only drag me down if I don't fight. I will accept the challenge no matter how tough it is, for I am tougher than the problems.

Halu-halo ang nararamdaman ko habang nakatitig nang malalim sa malalaking letra na nakapaskil sa itaas ng arch signage. Kung ang dating dalawang salitang nagbibigay ng ginhawa kapag ako'y napupuno ng masasamang emosyon noon, ngayon ay para na akong sinasakal nito.

Mas nanaig ang kirot, galit at takot ko nang maibaba ang tingin sa nakapaskil na pamilyar na pangalan. How dare they change the wonderful name that perfectly suits this place into the name of greed and hypocrisy?

Everything has been changed. They did remove and change the signage with their powerful name, but they have failed to remember the traces of the name of the person of the person who first owned it.

Gusto kong sumigaw sa galit na nadarama habang masakit na nakatitig sa pangalan na aking lubos na kinasusuklaman. Gusto kong sirain ang signage sa itaas ng arkang yari sa kahoy na na inangkin na rin ng mga mayayabong baging. Those wild vines are like their family description: boastful, greedy, and possessive of something they never owned in the first place, while I am the old legendary arch, still standing and fighting not to lose everything.

This isn't the place to be scared, Ezthera.

This is not the right time to show your rage.

This is the place that you should fight for.

This is the place that you should save.

No matter how tough, you must take over your father's land, Mariah.

"I've been a diver for years, but telling the depth of your sigh? I swear, it cannot be dived, Ez. Take a breath. You need more oxygen to compose yourself and your mind in that place."

I turned my gaze at the man who suddenly held my hand to keep it from trembling. This man, besides me, is the best companion I ever had for 7 years. He was there when things got hard and when I was too broken. He was with me when I lost it all, and he is still here with me even now that I'm on my way to get back everything I lost.

I didn't notice myself sighing heavily or my shaking hands, but what caught me the most was the thought that made me anxious.

But am I really prepared for this?

Naiisip ko pa lang na magku-krus ulit ang landas ko sa mga taong sinira ang lupang minahal ko. Nabubuhay ang takot sa loob ko. I'm not scared to fight for my land. I am more scared that I might ruin the plan because of the fear that my own grudge and vengeance will drown me.

But why am I asking myself for something I've been embracing for years? I am not the slow-witted Eztheraleigh anymore, like how my cousin defined me before. I changed from head to toe. The Ezther they knew was gone and dead, and he was buried in the pit of anger and pain for a long time. I am no longer the down-to-earth person who can easily be fooled by fake kindness.

I smirked as I laid my eyes on his messy tie. Marami na akong naayos at naintindihan sa buhay, ngunit hindi ko pa rin maunawaan kung bakit hanggang ngayon ay hindi pa rin marunong umayos ng necktie ang lalaking 'to.

I walked close to him to fix his tie and the collar of his suit; both are the things I gave him on his birthday last month. At ngayon niya pa talaga naisipang suotin.

"It's been years, bal. I've been encountering a lot of storms while sailing in the midst of ocean rage and lies. Naging bato na ako sa mga bagay-bagay, and you're the greatest witness of who I am now. You know that." Pinagpagan ko nang marahan ang gahiblang alikabok sa kanyang balikat at saka umatras nang makita ang pamilyar na bulto ng sinuman.

It's true. The sweetest muffin turned into a cold, precious rock, and even the coldest and darkest storms never bother me anymore.

Or should I say the warm inside of me had faded away for a long, long time? long time.

Ang lugar na noon ay ayokong iwanan, ngayo'y kailangan kong ipaglaban. Everyone loses their hopes to fight for their own land, but not for me, because I solely believe that there's more to fight for the land I cherish the most.

But will it be easy if the safest angel I used to know, who once guarded my roller coaster journey, will now be the hardest opposition to defend my own land?

I should have known in the beginning...

that the worst guardian angel is coming.