Tears of the Clueless

Bam! Right In The Kisser!

I sighed as I woke up. My dream had consisted mainly of Renji and me.

In my dreams, I'd been cool, funny, sexy. He laughed at my amazing jokes, asked me on a date (which went perfectly), and declared his undying love to me.

Yeah, in my dreams.

I sighed yet again and looked at the clock.

And then had a heart attack.

"Oh, frick, I'm going to be late!" I yelled, leaping out of bed. I yanked on the academy uniform and ran out the door, frantically combing my fingers through my hair and struggling with my text books.

***

So, I totally made it in record time, and even had five minutes to spare. I looked fabulous and strut through the halls like the perfection I was.

Yeah, right.

In reality, I burst into class at the last possible second, my long hair messy and my blue eyes wild.

"I'm sorry I'm late!" I said a bit too loudly, bowing frantically as my classmates guffawed at me.

The teacher sighed loudly, pinging the bridge of his nose. "Just.... Take your seat, Miss Heitsu, so we can begin the exam."

It's a damn good thing I studied. I mean, really, an exam on my second day? I call some serious BS.

I hurried to my seat, only to be tripped half way. I hit the ground with a loud 'THUMP' and the class burst into another round of laughter. The teacher said absolutely nothing about it, just made an impatient sound as I hurried to my feet and sat in the very back.

Figures I couldn't escape bullies with Death, and I guarantee that kicking the ass of whoever just tripped me would earn me a one way ticket to expulsion.

Well ain't this just awesome?

"Begin," teach said, setting a timer.

I flipped over the paper on my desk and hunched over, setting to work on filling in the blanks and circling the answers. It was incredibly easy, and I have to be grateful that the fatal bump to my noggin didn't kill my awesome memory and reading skills.

Then again, if it weren't for that fatal bump on my noggin, I wouldn't be in this mess.....

Anyways!

I finished the exam in record timing and flipped it back over at the top left corner of my desk. I got a scrap piece of paper from my notebook and started doodling as I happily let my mind wander.

Not so surprisingly, my train of thoughts chugged right into Renji Station.

I thought about his fiery red hair, his chocolate brown eyes, his tattooed eyebrows and the funny shades he always appeared to wear.

And then I had to freeze and restrain from slapping myself.

What was I doing? I never, ever got this worked up over some guy! I never had to, no one had ever been interested and I convinced myself that I wasn't looking for a relationship.

But... What made Renji so different? Was it his soft eyes? His smile? His laugh? Was it the way he almost k-

Ahhhhhh! No! No! Don't think about that K-word! It's too embarrassing!

I tried fruitlessly to rub the blush from my cheeks.

I feel like such a girl...... O.o

Heh.... Who woulda thunk?

Bring. Bring. Bring!

You hear that timer?

Wake up, Ali. Stop daydreaming, Ali. Come back to the world of the weird kind of living, Ali.

And the train left Renji Station...

I looked at my doodle and jumped, realizing with flushed cheeks that I had ended up with a sketch of Renji.

Woah.... I've got it bad....

I shoved the paper into my pocket and zoned back in to pass my test forward.

"Alright class, that's all we had scheduled today, you'll get your scores tomorrow. Now go home."

Wow, loving you too, teach.

"What's this~!" A sickly sweet voice asked as the sketch was snatched from my pocket.

"Hey!" I yelled, going to grab it back from some weird blonde chick.

She danced out of the way and looked at the picture. She gasped, then shrieked with laughter.

"Oh! This is too rich! You really think you've got a chance with Abarai-fukutaicho!?"

Whoever was still here joined her in her next high peal of laughter.

"Give that back!" I shouted, standing up.

"Or what, you little dork?" She chortled. "What's a weakling like you going to do-"

My knuckles collided with her nose, I felt the cartilage shatter, and she shrieked.

"You bitch! You- you broke my nose!"

She dropped the sketch to stop the bleeding. I grabbed the paper and shoved it in my pocket. The teacher materialized next to us, seizing my elbow.

"Heitsu...." He said in a low tone, one that promised punishment.

"What's the problem?"

We all looked at Ikkaku and Yumichika, who had appeared in the classroom doorway.

"Miss Heitsu has been causing trouble," the teacher, who I'm now deeming Asshat, said with a sneer-like smile at me. "Would you two escort her to Yamamoto-sama for me?"

"Isn't that an overreaction?" I cut in. "I just broke her nose... And might've caused brain damage... But that's only assuming she's got a brain to damage."

Asshat shot me a glare that said 'Shut up you total fucktard.'

His mind-words, not mine, I swear.

Asshat went to his desk, wrote up a note, and handed it to Yumichika.

"We'll escort her," Ikkaku said. He grabbed my elbow and led me out the door.

Yumichika slid it shut with a way too dramatic 'BANG!'.

Ikkaku burst into laughter. "'Assuming she's got a brain to damage!' Genius! You just made my day, Ali!"

I gave a sweet smile and curtsy. "I try ever so hard to be a good Kid."

"Ikkaku, don't encourage her behavior," Yumichika scolded, but I could see his lips twitching.

"What'd she do to ya, anyways!?" Ikkaku chortled. "We showed up at the best time! Lucky~!"

I kept quiet.