Tears of the Clueless

Renji, Please!

"Renji!" I called again, running faster than I've ever ran before. I grabbed his wrist and dug my heels into the floor.

"What?" He asked quietly, his head down. He was trembling, his fist clenching and loosening as he- what? Kept his temper in check? Probably.

He tore his wrist from my clutches and I took a startled step back before looking guiltily to my feet.

"I'm sorry," I whispered. "I didn't want to hurt you...... I-"

"Save it, Alice," he snapped. I cringed back, taking yet another step in hurt. "You avoid me for a week, and I was so concerned. I was coming to track you down and demand you tell me what was wrong so I could help. Then I find...." He shook his head violently, and I felt tears welling up in my eyes.

"Renji..."

"What?!" He snapped, looking back at me. His face was as red as his hair and a muscle throbbed in his temple. He was... Glaring at me.... "What, Alice?! I know you were awake that day in the hospital, you know how I felt, and I was so scared that..."

"Renji, please, I-" I reached out to him, but he slapped my hand away and I recoiled as if he'd just slapped me across the face.

"You've made your choice, Alice," he spat coldly. "Leave me alone."

Two broad backs appeared in my line of vision, a bald head and perfect haircut. Ikkaku and Yumichika.

"I suggest you calm down, Renji-San." Yumichika said quietly, and I could tell he was glaring.

"Or I'll have to beat your face to a pulp," Ikkaku snarled, fists tight at his sides.

"Try it," snapped Renji, and I shook my head.

"I... I haven't..." I stuttered lamely as tears began to flow. They looked at me as I rubbed my sleeve against my eyes. "I never meant.... I haven't chose... And I..." I bit my lip and glared weakly at Renji, who stopped, the red slowly dropping from his face.

"I haven't chosen anyone, Renji," I said, cursing myself for hiccuping and the crack of my voice. "I was trying to tell you but.... Forget it! I give up, I'm done! You want me to leave you alone?! Fine! Because I-am-done!" I stomped past him, and Ikkaku and Yumichika strode at my sides.

Once we turned a corner, though, I broke.