In Drunken Matrimony ✔️

Five - Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better

Hᴀʟʟɪᴇ

Suddenly, the studio seems too warm, the flood lights too bright, and the room too crowded.

Why the fuck did I just say that!

No, I know exactly why I said it. Helena. This entire show has been her incessant gloating. Triumph after triumph, in her career path and personal life. That, accompanied by her subtle - and not so subtle - jibes to my capabilities, my ambition, the fact I am nothing but a 'fall back' child to my parents... my tolerance of her has quickly depleted. Disintegrated into dust.

More so, the announcement of her engagement the very same week when I am due to be promoted to CEO. Unlike my sister, I don't thrive on attention, but that was my success, and I quite literally felt my thunder being stolen. Well, perhaps you got engaged, Helena, but I actually got married.

The noise of the crowd drops to a hushed whisper. Perhaps they see my sweating, as I realise how much of a fuck up I've just made. He might be watching this. Most of the country will be watching this. My parents will be watching this.

No; it's not because of me that they are whispering - it is the dropped jaw of my sister, the flush of jealousy that has brandished her face.

Minnie makes no move to talk, her eyes flitting nervously from myself to Helena, but it works in my favour. I need damage control, and quickly, before the questions come that I just can't answer.

"No one knew I was dating," I begin softly, offering a chaste look to the audience. "We come from very different lifestyles, and I've seen firsthand how that can instil a divide within a new relationship. It was entirely secret, just him and I. Even family," I gesture loosely to my gobsmacked sister, "were completely in the dark."

I have the audience on the edges of their seats, hanging to my every word, and their intrigue helps me settle slightly, loosen into the lie I'm weaving. "He's a private man, and so we chose to keep our relationship a secret, for his benefit and mine. I think it's that which helped us fall in love so quickly. No interruptions, no fake stories, just him and me. It didn't take me very long to realise that he's all I'll ever need." The crowd coos and Minnie relaxes, smiling, as the voice within her ear piece feeds her the information of the influx of viewers thanks to my bombshell.

"You don't wear your ring," Helena points out in a fluster, pointing to my hands which are clasped on my lap.

I shake my head, scrambling for a reason why. I decide to use the privacy excuse, considering it seems to work with everything else. "We agreed that a wedding ring would only spark speculation. Especially now, with my sister and I finding ourselves in tabloid news and on lovely talk shows," Minnie grins even wider, "so instead, we exchanged gummy rings. We ate them after we left the chapel." The crowd laughs as I force a chuckle.

"So what made you announce this with us today?" Minnie asks.

I chew on my lip, deliberating on a response, considering I can't exactly explain that I'm sick to the fucking teeth of my sister and her constant need to shit all over my parade. "We spoke before the show. We realised that we shouldn't have to keep such a pure love hidden for fear of malicious intervention. We know we're solid, and nothing can break us." Minnie nods in understanding, and she moves to ask another question, but I already anticipate what it is. "He's not ready for the cameras quite yet. He's awful at public speaking - even made a mess of the vows in front of the priest." Once more, the crowd laugh as I recall the completely fake memory.

"Understandable," Minnie asks. She edges forward, Helena no longer any of her concern. My sister is all but seething, and I know that as soon as we step foot from this stage, she will let me hear her wrath. "But, could we perhaps get a name?"