Our Darkest Memories

~ Lost Memory

Forgetting

It had taken Nadia and me a whole week to prepare for our escape. We had thoroughly discussed it, and it seemed best to leave that night. Initially, we wanted to leave earlier, but there was a change of plans. Namely, halfway through the week, Clancy had started to assign me tasks in which I needed to guard the camp. It had given us an advantage since I could find out more about the security system, but that again also delayed us.

But it didn't matter too much, since we also needed food to survive when we were out. I had seen before what malnutrition looked like. Back when Blaze and I used to travel together I could see how weak she was and how hard it was to keep traveling. As for me, I could count my ribs due to the hunger that was devouring me.

If there was anything we could do to prevent that from happening, we would take it. So we had used the extra time to get our hands on food and we had quietly been trying to take food from the camp that they wouldn't miss. A can of beans from one place, a bag with potatoes from somewhere else. Whatever we could find, we would take.

But that night, it would all come to an end. I had been nervous all day and Nadia was also unable to hide her nerves. The plan was to sneak out after dinner. At that moment, many people would have the task to wash the dishes and it was the moment when the guards would switch. I thought that it would probably be the best moment to escape, and so that day, we were nervously sitting at the wooden table with our dinner in front of us.

Nadia was skipping her leg, making the whole table shake. No one was sitting with us though, so she didn't bother anyone besides me. And I could also not be bothered, as I was constantly biting my nails while anxiously looking around. For some reason, I had the feeling like everyone just knew what we were up to. As if we had written on our foreheads 'We are going to escape'.

So when a tall, older-looking boy with long, black hair stopped at our table and said my name, I instantly felt startled. Luckily, he told me in a grumpy tone that Clancy had asked to see me.

Though Nadia gave me a concerned look, I shrugged my shoulders and shook it off. "It probably just has to do with my tasks," I assured her and I walked away to the cabin that Clancy used.

When I got there, Clancy's door was open, but I knocked nevertheless. It didn't have much use though, as my steps already made the floorboards of the cabin creak, which made Clancy notice my entrance right away. His head shot up from his work and a wide smile spread across his face when he saw me.

"Morgan," he greeted. But something felt off. He was behaving way too optimistic. Though this week I had tried to become a little closer to Clancy so he wouldn't suspect anything, I had never seen him this happy before. But he also had a nervous twitch in the corner of his mouth.

I greeted him back and awkwardly looked around the room.

"You probably wonder why you're here." He scratched the back of his neck. "I wanted to tell you something that I wanted to tell you for a little while."

He stepped closer to me. Though he looked nervous, he sounded confident. "Look, I like you. I feel like I've known you for so long, even though we have only met two weeks ago. So I finally wanted to tell you right now that I really like you."

He came up towards me and almost planted his lips on mine. I was frozen on the spot by his suddenness but eventually managed to move and step away. He stepped with me and said, "I know you like me too."

Maybe he was once a nice kid and he would have been attractive, not only through his looks but also through his behavior. But now, he was lost. Incredibly lost. And that caused him to get broken from within. I could never love someone like him. That only made me realize what situation I was in.