All Along - Steve Rogers {1}

Chapter 8: Meant For Something Greater

November 1943

Steve stared down at the notepad that rested against his lap, his pencil stroking against the page as he shaded in the self portrait of himself: a dancing circus monkey, he thought it was his mirror image. God, he felt low, and pathetic. Here he was mere miles from the front line and he had been brought in as entertainment... and even that had gone to hell.

The rain had begun to pour, soaking the ground so much that your feet would sink upon stepping on it. Steve had taken shelter under a canopy, his jacket done up right around his body to protect from the icy chill. He turned the page in his notebook and sighed, the illustration that was the spitting image of Nellie made his heart ache.

She hadn't responded to his letters in nearly two months, he was starting to think that he had said something wrong, been too forward with his affections. That, or Howard Stark had sunk his claws into her and wooed her with his money, though he didn't think Nellie would be that shallow.

Steve sighed and let his head fall into his hands. His life was supposed to get better after the serum... not worse.

"Hello, Steve." A voice he hadn't heard for a while caused him to sit up and spin around in his seat. Agent Carter looked as beautiful as ever, despite being soaked through.

Steve smiled kindly at her. "Hi."

"Hi." Peggy returned the smile, her heart lifting lightly. Then her smile widened when she realised what he was wearing.

"What are you doing here?" Steve asked, surprised to see her near the front line at all. He assumed she'd be in the lab with Nellie and Howard, or out doing spy stuff in some other European country.

"Officially I'm not here at all. That was quite a performance." Peggy gestured towards the stage that was currently being scrubbed down of squashed and rotten tomatoes.

"Yeah. Uh... I had to improvise a little bit. Crowds I'm used to are usually more uh... twelve." Steve admitted, embarrassed. He didn't even understand why he had been shipped off to 'perform' at the front lines anyway, it was just humiliating.

"I understand you're "America's New Hope"?" Peggy went on with a smile. She wasn't usually one for admitting feelings but there was something about Steve that made her heart flutter, maybe it was his courage, or just his heart, and she couldn't deny the muscles were a bonus. He was just so genuine, it was hard to find a man like that these days.

"Bond sales take a ten percent bump in every state I visit." Steve said in his deep, Captain America voice. That one always made the women swoon. In all honestly Steve didn't like the extra attention, he didn't like being a celebrity.

"Is that Senator Brandt I hear?" Peggy asked knowing that Steve's enthusiastic response did not come from his own feelings.

"At least he's got me doing this. Phillips would have had be stuck in lab." Steve complained as he looked back down at the notebook in his lap to see Nellie's face staring back up at him. "At least Nellie gets to help produce weapons."

Peggy followed his eyes to the page that was covered in Nellie. Her face, her lips, her eyes, her hands, all extremely life like and drawn with exquisite detail. Peggy's heart sunk a little so she turned her attention to the other page where a monkey wearing a uniform similar to Steve's stars and stripes was riding a unicycle. "And these are your only two options? A lab rat or a dancing monkey? You were meant for more than this, you know?" Peggy consoled him as she placed a comforting hand on Steve's shoulder. Steve opened his mouth to respond but decided against it. "What?" Peggy asked.

Steve sighed. "You know for the longest time I dreamed about coming overseas and being on the front lines. Serving my country. I finally get everything I wanted, and I'm wearing tights." He ranted as he looked down at Nellie's portrait again. His heart hurt. He missed her so much sometimes he felt like he couldn't breathe. They were meant to be here together, fighting and doing good. The distant honking of an ambulance horn in the background drew Steve out of his thoughts. He looked back over his shoulder to see men rushing around to the back of the ambulance to help to tend to the wounded soldiers. "They look like they've been through hell."