He Ghosted Me (Dela Vega Cousins #1)

Chapter 14

It's the second time I can't concentrate while writing because of his gaze. Sweats are slowly forming in my forehead, my knees are shaking because of the abnormal heartbeat of my heart. And thank goodness! I'm sitting or else I'm gonna stumble,  but I'm not thankful to the man in front me. The man who gives me a dangerous foreign feelings.

In my peripheral vision. His leaning on his chair and fold his arms across his chest. It's like his watching a very interesting movie that even the noise from his co-teacher can't get his attention away from it.

Is it just me or it's just me. That I'm the one he cant get his eyes off?

Am I that assuming? If yes. Then blame it to the one who keeps on staring at me!

What if it's not me? Wala namang ibang narito kundi kaming tatlo lang. Ako, siya, at yung teacher na malayo sa amin na may katawagan sa telepono.

Baka may multo sa likoran ko at nakita niya yun? Hindi lang niya sinasabi dahil baka matakot ako?

That thought made me cringe a bit. I'm not that scared of ghost but I'm not that fun with it either. Well, I enjoy watching horror movies because it's just a movie. And I'm not wishing to see it in reality. Uso pa naman sa amin ang mga kwento na may multo sa paaralan.

Tumigil ako sa pagsulat at nagtatakang sinulyapan ko siya. Umarko ang isa kong kilay sa patanong na paraan. "What?"  I ask. Di ko na makayanan ang intensidad ng kaniyang mga titig.

"Nothing."  Was the answer I heard from him. I just nodded but I didn't continue the task he asked me to do.

My mind is in great chaos right now. I'm confuse from what's happening recently. I'm baffled from his actions and to the way he treated me.  I'm completely baffled because of him giving me this unknown feeling. And I can't help myself but to be drown slowly.

"What's on your pretty little mind?"  A husky voice came in front of me.

Facebook ikaw ba yan? Ay hindi. May pretty little kasi. Kung ganito na lang kaya ang sa Facebook? Para naman may ganang mag update ng status ang mga tao. Pagkabasa mo palang sa pretty ginanahan kana!

Ang galing mo talaga self.

"Huh?"  I snap myself.

He just shakes his head and flashed me his  *a trillion dollar smile*. Yes, a trillion. Maiba naman tayo.

Five minutes had passed. And I'm already done. I handed it to him and he grab it immediately. Tumayo ako at pinagpagan ang sarili na para bang may alikabok sa aking damit. Hindi naman siguro halata na hindi ako comfortable no?

"Una na po ako Kuy---"

"Are you not comfortable with me?"  Putol niya sa dapat ko sanang sasabihin at ngumuso.

Haluh! May pagkabata pala to?

"Huh? Hindi naman po sa ganon!"  Sagot ko at winasiwas yung dalawa kong mga kamay sa aking harapan. Halatang defensive ang loka-loka.

"Is that so? Then can I have a lunch with you tomorrow? I mean the three of you? Please?"  He beamed as he asked me. His mood changed that fast?

Oh! Bloody hell! What to do?

"Ahmm...."

"Well. No need, I'm going to have a lunch with the three of you tomorrow. And it's final."  He cut me off and laugh. While he laugh, it shows his well defined jaw perfectly. Masyadong pinagpala ka boy? Samantalang ako? Nah! mukhang si Nanno kapag tumatawa. Bwuhahaha.

Pero at least maganda diba? I mean si Nanno.

Pagkatapos niyang tumawa ay bumalik naman sa neutral ang kaniyang mukha. May saltik ba 'to? O kulang lang sa turnilyo?

"Oh. Okay?"  Sabi ko na lang pero nagmukhang patanong na pagkasabi.

"Umupo ka muna."  Ani niya pagkatapos niyang tumawa. Kaya umupo ako at pinagkatitigan ang mga bookshelf sa kaniyang likoran.

"May sa sab----"  Naputol ang dapat sana niyang sasabihin nang magring ang kaniya cellphone sa lamesa. I accidentally darted my eyes on the screen of his phone. My love is the callers name. Before he caught me starring at his phone, nilihis ko na ang aking paningin at binalik sa bookshelf.

"Wait here. I'm just gonna answer this call."  He said. Tumango lang ako. Pagkatapos niyang makita yun ay lumakad siya palayo.

Hindi naman masyadong malayo siya sa akin kaya kita ko parin' dito kung paano siya ngumiti. For now, I can't understand why do people say to their girlfriend or boyfriend that they are his or her happiness.

I guess it's true, that you can be his happiness. But tragic at the same time, when he is your happiness but his happiness is not you.

Love can make you do the things you didn't imagine you could do. It can make you smile while hurting, it can make you dumb and blinding yourself from the truth that your are no longer his happiness, it can make you swallow your pride just for your lover to be with your arms again.

Love can make you feel worthless. Tell me, after a lovers broke up. Who can't ask their self after they fall apart? Falling in love is hard, it's so great but at the same time it's painful. Especially when you invest your feelings for him but he just easily breach it. Try to make sure if the one you invested your feelings can be reciprocated, it's easy to utter the word pain but it's an excruciating feeling when you feel it.

I guess I already sounded bitter. But it's just my perspective. We all had our perspective, and this is my perspective because of my surroundings.

People will cry because of love. People can be dumb because of love. People will ask their worth because of love. People questions their physical appearance because of love.

"Did you eat already? Oh not again! Don't scape your lunch love I'm worried. I know and I miss you too, very much."  I look at his face while he's saying those words. It shows happiness, contented, and........love.

I would like to stop the time and go back to the past. Where I once a girl who doesn't care with anybody, except for my family, relatives, and friends. But my life is not in a genre of a fantasy, it's the reality itself slap me from my fantasy.

Sometimes I think that reality is the number one antagonist of my life.  Sa pantasiya ko na nga lang siya makakasama na walang sabit, may tilaok pa ng manok ang gigising sa akin tuwing umaga.

I storm outside that room without informing him. This feeling is toxic. I'm afraid to give a try. This is just the beginning of the story but it shows that I have no chance at all.

It hurts. I'm just a human loving a in a relationship man. Can you blame me if my heart is beating to a wrong person?

I'm afraid to invest my love for him because he already invested his love. And the sad part is.

My love for him will be hangin' in the air.

Stupid heart! Please stop beating for him! Maybe if I could dictate my heart, I already did it the first time my heart beats abnormally. How I wish I could. So that I could prevent this from happening.

Why? I didn't do anything but why do I feel this torture? I just loved him. Yeah, love. I thought from the start that it will stay in like but it turns out into love.

Life is full of surprises,
just like love.
Love is full of unexpected
happenings.

And I'm not expecting myself to love him in a painful way.