Incorrect Quotes 5 ft. The Sins

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Lancelot : If I run and leap at Galehaut, they will most certainly catch me in their arms.
Lancelot , running towards Galehaut: Coming in!
Galehaut: No! I'm holding coffee!
Galehaut: *Drops coffee and catches Lancelot *

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Teacher: Your child was in a fight.
Elaine : Oh no, that's terrible!
Ban: Did he win?

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Nasiens : Someone care to explain why we have 6 dogs in our apartment?
Percival : They're golden retrievers, dude. They retrieve gold. I did this for us.

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Ban : Guys where did Lancelot go?
Meliodas : He got arrested.
Ban : How the hell-
Lancelot : *bursts in through the window* The cops are after me, I thought it would be fun to steal crackers and throw them at people.

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King to the kids: First rule of battle, little ones... don't ever let them know where you are.
Ban and Meliodas, shouting out of frame: WHOO-HOO! I'M RIGHT HERE! I'M RIGHT HERE! YOU WANT SOME O' ME?! YEAH YOU DO! COME ON! COME ON! AAAAAH! Whoo-hoo!
King: 'Course, there're other schools of thought.

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Lancelot: So Tristan , how did your first time cooking dinner go?
Tristan : Pretty good if I do say so myself.
Percival : Oo! Okay, what are we having?
Tristan : Alright, so for appetizers, we have a potato.
Donnie : A whole potato?
Tristan : Yes. And then for the main course, we have grilled cheese sandwiches!
Nasiens : These just look like big slabs of black.
Tristan : Because that's what they are!
Tristan : And then for desert, we have chocolate.
Anne : These are just chocolate chips?
Tristan : They sure are!
Tristan : And then for drinks, we have toast!
Tristan : *lifts up a glass of blended toast* Bon appetite!
Lancelot and Galehaut: *lounging on a tree eating apples*

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Percival: I am very small and I have no money, so you can imagine the kind of stress that I'm under.

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Tristan : What's it like being tall?
Lancelot : Is it nice?
Galehaut : Can you reach comfortably for the cupboards?
Ban: We live in constant fear of the short ones who, in my experience, will climb 4 chairs, 2 boxes, a small coffee table and 6 oddly placed stools to get what they want.
Meliodas : It was one time!

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Lancelot : Where are my fucking keys?
Tristan : Lancelot, Percival is around, can you say it a little nicer?
Lancelot : May I ascertain the whereabouts of my FUCKING KEYS?!

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*Everyone is giving advice to Lancelot *
Galehaut : It's okay to ask for help.
King: You're not a burden.
Ban: Murder is okay.
Meliodas: Your feelings matter.

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Lancelot : When I was a kid, Dad told me that the paper strip that's in the chocolate kisses were edible and I ate them with the chocolate for a year.
King: They are!
Lancelot : FOR REAL?
King: No! Why did you fall for it again?

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King: Captain, Ban's refusing to wear his glasses!
Ban: King, look, I wore the glasses for a day. My eyes are much better now. Watch.
Ban: *points to Lancelot* Tristan.
Ban: *points to Tristan* Lancelot.
Ban: *points to Percival* Sasquatch.

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Galehaut : Christmas lights?
Percival: Check.
Lancelot: Thermos of hot cocoa?
Percival: Check.
Tristan : Santa suits?
Percival: Check.
Nasiens: Shovel?
Percival: Check.
Gowther: Alibi and bail money?
Percival: Check- wait, WHAT?!

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*The gang responding to being stabbed by a sword*
Lancelot: Rude.
Galehaut : That's fair.
Percival: Not again.
Tristan: Are you gonna want this back or can I keep it?

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Gowther: If you put 'violently' in front of anything to describe your action, it becomes funnier.
Gowther: Violently practices.
Tristan: Violently studies.
King: Violently sleeps.
Lancelot : Violently shoots pictures.
Ban : Violently boxes.
Galehaut : Violently murders people.
Meliodas: Violently worries about the previous statement.

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Meliodas, rubbing his temples: I am not proud of what I am about to say, but someone get me a cigarrette.
Ban: But Cap'n, we don't smoke.
Meliodas : Cut the crap, Ban. I'm not an idiot. I know that one in five people smoke.
Meliodas : *points at King* One! *points at Gowther * Two! *points at Gilthunder * Three! *points at Diane* Four! *points at Ban* Five!
Meliodas : Now, I am going to close my eyes, and when I open them, there better be a cigarrette between these two fingers!
Gowther: *puts a cigarrette in Meliodas' hand*
Meliodas : Thank you. ...Light?
The Squad: *all simultaneously pull out lighters*

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Donnie: Is it still visible? Where Anne slapped me?
Percival: Your face looks like a don't walk signal.
Nasiens : Your face looks like a photo negative for the hamburger helper box.
Sin : A palm reader could tell Percival 's future by looking at your face.
Tristan : The phrase 'talk to teh hand cause the face ain't listening' doesn't work for you, because the hand is your face.
Donnie: ...A simple 'yes' would've sufficed.

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Meliodas, walking into the castle: Hello, people who do not live here.
King: Hey.
Diane : Hi.
Elaine : Hello.
Ban: Hey!
Meliodas: I gave you the key to the castle for emergencies only!
Gowther : We were out of Doritos.

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Gilthunder : Man, they look like a real handful. How do you deal with them?
Mael, watching Percival screaming, Lancelot and Galehaut trying to set a live chicken on fire, and Tristan choking on air: I don't know either.

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Gowther : The floor is lava!
Diane: *helps Elaine onto the counter*
King: *kicks Ban off the sofa*
Meliodas: *lays on the floor*
Gowther : ...Are you okay?
Meliodas: Yes, it's really warm, like a hot tub.

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*The squad's reaction to being told they're the chosen one*
Anne : I will not let you down.
Percival : Sounds fun.
Nasiens: No, I'm fucking not.
Donnie: Do I have to be?
Sin: Please god, I am so tired.

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Elaine: What do you call disobeying the law?
The Sins: A hobby.
Elaine: *crosses their arms*
The Sins: That we do not engage in.

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Percival: Do you cook?
Tristan : I made a cake once.
Lancelot : Yeah, it was good.
Tristan : Really?
Lancelot : Don't make me lie twice, Tristan.

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King : Damn, the power went out.
Gowther: Don't worry, I got this.
Gowther: *shakes rapidly and starts to light up*
King : What-?
Gowther: I swallowed a glow stick!
King, on the verge of tears: WHY WOULD YOU-

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Lancelot: TRISTAN I NEED HELP WITH MY HOMEWORK
Tristan: We graduated ten years ago
Lancelot: Then why am I writing a 2000 word essay about the industrial revolution?!
Tristan: Why ARE you writing a 2000 word essay about the industrial revolution?

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Donnie: Hi-
Anne: Leave before there's a terrible misunderstanding between my foot and your ass.

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