JJ Maybank Imagines

[f] He Thinks You Don't Love Him

Imagine type: fluff

Warning: hasn't been edited!

———

To you, it was a normal day. You and JJ sat together on the beach, closely huddled together though it was warm out. It was how a lot of your days were spent; hence, it was normal.

To JJ, it was another day of worry and anxiety as he waited for the moment when you finally realized you were too good for him. Still, he sat upon the threaded beach blanket, trying to convince himself otherwise until he couldn't take it anymore.

Taking notice of his uncomfortable state, you cross your legs to the other side, sitting even closer to him.

"JJ, are you feeling okay?" You ask him gently, wishing you could read his thoughts because even though he seemed stern, he was soft and sensitive and even though you loved that, it was hard to know what he was thinking.

"I..." he began, eyes flicking to study your face and your delicate features, but he couldn't continue, afraid of what you would say.

"You don't need to tell me," you offer him a comforting smile, taking his hand into yours and his grip felt weak and tired. "But if you want to, you can."

His fingers brushed over your knuckles sweetly, wondering how exactly he could word his thoughts as eloquently as you usually did, but he couldn't find a way, so he blurted it out.

"You... you still love me. Right?" He regretted his words as soon as he said it, not only from the sheer embarrassment he felt, but also because he was afraid of hearing your answer.

His words could not have broken your heart more. You had always been the insecure one—the wary one more like—and yet JJ sat here with you and he looked so vulnerable and pleading.

"Why do you ask that?" You reply, frowning, but even more so when you notice the humiliation in JJ's expression. He was obviously uncomfortable speaking about this and yet so bothered that he couldn't forget about the matter anyways.

So he was forced to deal with situation himself, doubting himself, and you wanted to slap yourself for not noticing sooner.?

"I'm not the most... affectionate boyfriend," he admits, his head hung low in what you assumed was shame, though he had nothing to be ashamed about. "Doesn't it ever bother you?"

You let out a shaky breath, trying to figure out a reasonable response to all of this. Were you to be honest with him or comforting? Or maybe both? If that was even possible.

"I know that you care for me," you begin, still holding onto his limp hand tightly. "You show it in your own way and I don't want you to feel. . . forced to do something that you don't want to do simply to make me happy."

"But I should be doing things to make you happy—"

"But not at your own expense," you correct him, sitting up slightly taller to look at him better. "You already show me you love me in many different ways."

"But you deserve more," JJ barely manages to say, his throat feeling tight and his body achy because he's tired from being kept up by his intrusive thoughts.

"JJ, listen to me," you murmur and you smile when you see his desperate, blue eyes. "Stand up. Give me your other hand."

Though he's utterly confused at your strange request, he follows you as you stand up and take both his hands, squeezing lightly.

"This is all I need," you shrug, looking down at your guys' hands, intertwined.

"What do you mean?" His voice is soft and you smile when you catch a glimpse of his questioning eyes.

"You, JJ," you try to explain. "You, your presence; it's all I need. The fact that you're here with me makes me feel happier than I could ever possibly explain."

His shoulders, tense with stress before, begin to relax, definitely not expecting you to say that.

"If you want to continue to build our relationship," you go on, gazing up at him. "We can do that. But if you think you need to change for me, then you are very wrong."

JJ pulls you closer to him, wrapping his arms around you gratefully and inhaling your sweet scent, his head buried in your neck.

"I didn't expect you to say that," he mumbles against your shoulder and you can barely hear him, but you know what he's saying.

"What did you expect me to say?" You ask with genuine curiosity, feeling the warmth of his body against yours.

He seems to squirm for a short moment before settling back into your arms and you decide to sit him back down on the beach blanket before continuing the conversation.

"I thought you would break up with me," JJ confesses. "I thought you would end things between us."

"How long have you been feeling like this?" Suddenly you feel so full of regret. Wondering why it took you so long to figure out what was wrong.

"A couple months," he shrugs and you drop your head in your hands at his words, upset with yourself for ignoring him. "Hey, this isn't your fault," he adds hastily, catching sight of your actions.

"Is this why you haven't been sleeping?" You ask him and he freezes.

"What do you mean?"

You know he's being oblivious on purpose, but you're already onto the next thought before you can figure out why.

"I should've asked you about this sooner," You mutter, running impatient hands through your hair. "I should've noticed."

"This isn't your fault," JJ says yet again, this time grabbing your hands, forcing you to look at him. "This was me. I should've come to you sooner if I was really that worried."

"You haven't been sleeping," you say regretfully. "You've been so tired and I wondered why, but..."

"We've talked about it now," he comforts you. "And now we can just enjoy each other's company, yeah?"

You take a while to convince, but finally you give up and JJ lays his head in your lap, the warm air causing him to become drowsier by the second.

"Go to sleep," you murmur. "It's okay now, you're okay."

It must be the sound of the waves or the way you play with his hair, but soon enough, JJ's eyes stop fighting to stay open and he finally goes to sleep, leaving you to admire him silently.

———

Hey guys sooo I was wondering if there were possibly any other people you would like fanfics about?

Not that I'm done with JJ ffs but I've been wanting to try something new ! I won't judge you LOL

Anyways, I hope you all had amazing days or will have amazing days and I love you all SOSOOSOS much:)