[FLUFF] : y/n———
- you and JJ are ex's -
It's not like the breakup wasn't mutual, because it was. But that's possibly what pissed you off most.
You didn't fight for him to stay in your life, you let go easily—too easily. And he didn't fight for you either. You both took the easy way out, giving up after a few weeks because "being friends was just easier".
But it wasn't, in fact it was excruciating most of the time.
You couldn't get it right. You struggled to think of JJ as more than a friend, and now you struggled seeing him as anything less than a significant in your life.
The breakup didn't tone down the sexual tension, if anything it amplified it by ten times the original amount and you hated that.
It's like that saying People always want what they can't have. It's true.
There wasn't a day that passed that you didn't wish for JJ back.
All the intimacy was still there, and it was undeniable, even for other people.
Sitting on top of your roof, you look out to the massive party happening literally right in front of you on the beach.
You crush an empty can of beer and drop it into a bin below you.
"Ouch."
Surprised, you look down to see JJ rubbing his head, looking up at you.
"Sorry," you press your lips together sheepishly and usher him to throw the can away.
"Something tells me that isn't your first can," he grins, lightly kicking the bin full of empty cans.
You scoff, "Relax, JJ. They're not all mine."
"Sure about that?"
You chuckle, throwing a full can of beer at him this time, but to your dismay, he catches it. "The ladder's on the left."
You lean back again, listening to the thud of his shoes on the ladder as he lifts himself onto the roof.
"What made you decide to leave the party?" You ask once he settles down beside you.
He cracks the can open before responding. "Parties are better from afar."
"You did not just say that," you laugh.
JJ crinkles his nose, "Shut up. You were hogging all the beer and JB told me to retrieve it from you."
"No, he didn't," you shake your head. "Seriously?"
"I saw you and thought you might be lonely," he shrugs, and takes a short sip of beer, side-glancing you.
"How nice of you."
"Yeah, I've just . . ." JJ trails off. "I mean, you've been kind of distant lately, you know? You never seem to enjoy other people's company anymore."
"I don't enjoy large crowds," you correct him, not that his previous observation had been completely incorrect.
"Still," he persists. "Drinking beer by yourself on the roof—"
"Is my new favourite activity," you finish. "And besides, I'm not alone now."
You turn your attention back to the party, spotting Pope among the crowd and you let out a soft smile when you saw Kie beside him.
But your lips instantly straighten when you see another couple not far, tongues down each other's throats, or something like that.
"Is that what we used to look like?" You ask JJ.
"No, definitely not," he laughs, catching sight of two on the beach. "You wouldn't have let me slobber over you like that."
You shift, "Well, I like to think our relationship consisted more than just its physicality."
JJ nods, glancing over at you. "It did."
His voice has a certain sincerity in it that you find hard to ignore. You found it beyond unfair that his charms were still so alluring and effective on you.
You found it even more unfair when that strange feeling of contentment and happiness rushed back—the one you'd worked tirelessly to get rid of.
All your effort and there was no way you wouldn't recognize this feeling within a heartbeat.
It was addicting, to say the least, and you didn't always hate its existence.
"I mean, you just . . . understood me, you know?" You peek once more at the couple, wondering if they had that connection that you once did, and if so, you wished that they would hold on to that.
"That's why I like you," JJ said, playing with the can in his hands. "You know how to talk to me."
You look at him. "You're using present tense."
"What?"
"You're using present tense—to talk about us," you furrow your eyebrows. "It's as if you're implying that we're still together or . . . something."
JJ's mouth is open for a few seconds before any sound comes out. "Right—well," he then mutters something incomprehensible. Whether you were meant to hear it or not, you're not sure. "Sometimes it feels like we are still together."
You're not completely sure how to respond, but you know what JJ's saying is nothing short of the truth. "I guess I would be lying if I said I didn't feel the same."
You would definitely, 100% be lying if you said you didn't feel the same. It was something you noticed straight away after your breakup. It was as if your brain knew you were broken up, but your heart hadn't caught the hint.
You had never been so heartsore for someone.
"I wish we were still together," JJ's voice breaks the silence. You pause for a short moment.
This moment was confusing for a number of reasons. A confession is not what you had expected at all, but at the same time, you couldn't believe it had taken JJ this long to come forward and say something.
Your only regret was not coming forward first.
"You do?"
And that, ladies, gentlemen, folks, is how you ended up stumbling into your house, trying desperately to pull JJ closer even though there were negative two centimetres between you two.
He pushed his face into yours, hands running over your entirety, delving into the small of your back and then lower.
You felt like your skin was burning, running your fingers into his hair as he pushed you up against the wall. Your bodies wanted more than they could give, but that didn't stop the two of you from trying.
"I—don't know—what's happening," you eventually managed to say, your words getting caught between sharp breaths. You couldn't think, let alone speak.
"Liar," JJ grins cheekily against your mouth. "You know exactly what you're doing."
The growing tension made you feel dizzy, but alternately, you never wanted this to stop. If this was a dream, you didn't want to wake up.
"Maybe," you murmur softly.
You weren't sure where this was going, what you were going to do tomorrow. You weren't sure if you were going to get back together or slip away again after tonight.
All you knew was JJ was in front of you and you had no intention of ending this now. Whatever 'this' was.
And that was enough to get you through this evening, at least.
———
10 angry comments for a part 2😘😘 just kidding please be nice I'm sensitive
This quite possibly is the best imagine I have ever written
I'm sorry I've been MIA for so long school is so busy right now and chemistry is literally draining the life from me agahahahahah😐:D
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JJ Maybank Imagines
FanfictionMy only job here is to fuel your jj thirst I write a lot of angst cause I'm emotional and don't know how to cope with it👍 [August 8th] : HIT 100K READS, YEAH! [October 27th] : 200K READS WHAT THE HECK [June 17th] : 326K READS IM CRYING [October 4t...