Just Hold Me (Sidney Crosby) EDITING THEN CONTINUING

Chapter 36 - Wake up I Need You

My eyes flutter open to the brightness of the living room. Why am I on the fucking couch? It's hurts my fucking whenever I fucking sleep on this goddamn stupid ass couch.

God.

Hannah is standing above me, an annoyed look plastered on her face.

"Get up," she said, her eyes staring me down. "I made food."

Her voice was sharp and I could feel in the air how pissed she was. It was obvious.

Then, without another word she turns around, her hands in loose fists at her sides, and walks into the kitchen.

She picks up a plate with about three pancakes, whipped cream, syrup, butter, and strawberries. She sits down farthest away from me on the couch and starts to eat little bites at a time. She mostly stared at her food like she couldn't eat it even though she wanted to.

I huff quietly and stand up, taking long strides into the kitchen. I find a plate with a small pancake with no toppings on the couch. I pick up the plate and lay a finger on the pancakes. Cold as ice.

"Why is mine so cold?" I ask her, my head turning towards her in the living room as she turned on the tv.

"Well, when it came off the skillet, it was too hot. So I put in the freezer," she said harshly, scrolling through the channels.

"How come I don't get as much food?" I ask, kind of hurt.

"I'm fatter than you are, so I get more, and you don't deserve more than 1 anyway. If you want more, you can make more."

"You are not fat. Don't say that or I'll slap you." I said, teasingly, a smile spreading on my face, a small laugh coming from my mouth.

"Yeah, it's all curves." She says sarcastically.

"Seriously. Stop." I say, my tone getting harder.

"Or what? You'll slap me?" She says, her head turning towards me, but then goes back just as fast.

"Yeah, I just might." I say, knowing I won't, but still wanting to show her that I'm upset with all these negative remarks about herself. What do I have to do to make her aware of her beauty?

"And I'll rip your fucking dick off."

I dropped the plate back onto the counter and storm over to her.

"What's your problem?" I say, my voice getting louder than I truly desired.

She says nothing. Just stares at the tv, watching, ignoring me.

"Hannah." I say, my voice sharp.

Still nothing.

"Hannah, say something."

"No," she says quickly, her eyes still fixated on the screen behind me.

I scoff in disbelief, my eyebrows furrowing in annoyance, anger, and pure desperation.

"It's okay. Ignore me. It's not like I love you or anything."

She looks up at me, her plate still almost completely full.

She sets her plate on the counter next to where I set mine. I follow her in the kitchen.

I stand directly behind her, and as she turns around, she bumps into me.

"Talk to me." I say as she tries to step around me. I block her.

"Please." I say, stepping sideways again to barricade her intended exit. I grab her arms to gently keep her in place as I try to get some words out of her.

"There's nothing to talk about." She says, her eyes angry at me.

I throw her over my shoulder no matter how much her punches hurt my back, I walk into my bedroom and drop her on the bed. She moves her hair from her face as I quickly turn around and lock the door.

"Let me out, Sidney." She says, at her wits end.

"No, not until we talk."

"LET ME OUT!" She screams, grabbing at her head, her fingers digging into the sides of her temples. She covers her ears, and whimpers. "It's so loud." She whines sadly.

"What? What's loud?" I ask, walking over to her, worried.

"Th-the-this voice in my head! It...WON'T LEAVE ME ALONE." She says, crying. "I thought it was gone but it's back. It's back."

"Hannah, you need to calm down." I say as she jerks her arms, attempting to be free from some invisible hold.

"No, no, no. I am calm! I just want it to stop!" She says, her hands still clutching her head, fistfulls of hair out of place.

"Hannah, do you have medication you need to take? For-"

"I'M NOT CRAZY!" She screams at me, trying to punch me.

I grab her arms and try to stablize her.

"THEY ALL SAID I WAS CRAZY BUT I'M NOT, I SWEAR I'M NOT. I'M OKAY. I JUST..I'M NOT FAT OKAY? JUST LEAVE ME ALONE. STOP POINTING AT ME. STOP LAUGHING. QUIT IT! STOP! I MEAN IT!"

I have no idea what to think. Something's wrong. She must have meds for all the things she has. Did I forget them at her house?

Hospital. Hospital is all I can think.

Using almost all of my strength, I pull her out of my room and throughout my home and into my car outside, putting the child lock on the door so she can't get out.

I drive to the nearest hospital hearing her cry beside me.

When we get to the hospital, she was too wore out to fight me.

We walk into the Emergency Room entrance of the building and order her to be taken in at that moment. The woman behind the glass agreed quickly.

She was taken from me and was leaded into a room. I followed them as they placed her on a bed and wheeled her out. The lady stopped me before I could follow some more.

"Sir, we need to discuss-"

"No, I need to be with Hannah!"

"You will sir. You just need to answer some questions."

"Fine, just hurry. I need to be by her side."

"I understand sir. Do you have any knowledge of any of th patient's medical history?"

"No, not really for sure."

"Okay, what happened."

"She has anxiety, I know that, and she started freaking out, and seemed like she had a flashback from when she was in high school. She was bullied and she started screaming out things she wanted to say to them. It really scared me."

"Okay." She says, jotting down on a clipboard.

"Does-"

"Listen I don't know anything else, now let me see her!" I say, not even waiting for her answer. I run past her and desperately try to find Hannah.

I hear her scream in pain and I follow it.

"NO! STOP IT!" I hear her scream.

I find her room. Male doctors are holding her down by her limbs as one tries to put an IV in her arm.

"No! I hate needles! I'm...scared..of them." She whimpers, calming down rapidly. The needle is inserted in her arm and a liquid by the doctor was already pushed out of the syringe, and was now traveling through her veins, shooting through her system.

"She's sedated." I heard him say.

I sigh to myself. Wake up Hannah. I need you.