UNDISCLOSED DESIRES// BUCKY BARNES x OC

surrender

"Now rest doll, we have to do this all over again tomorrow." were the last words I heard from him last night before I drifted off to sleep. I was absolutely shot.

My eyes fluttered open slowly, the light of the early morning sun blasting through the half closed blinds. I slowly stretched my limbs under the warm blanket.
Then I realized I was in my underwear. I didn't remember taking my clothes off last night but then again I was unconscious for most of it. That sounded way worse.

I heard a peaceful, rhythmic breathing and turned to see Barnes sleeping next to me. What the hell ? He was shirtless.
I looked at him. From his eyes, long lashes every girl would have envied him for, perfect straight nose, those soft lips that were slightly open, jawline so sharp it could cut glass. Down from his neck to his perfectly defined chest, his dog tags sitting between his pecs in a light smattering of chest hair. His right hand sat on top of my thigh, a slight feeling of warmth started coming over me.

Somehow it didn't bother me that we slept in a bed together.
I didn't even have a nightmare tonight.

I felt him stir.

His eyes slowly open, head turning to face me.

"Good morning, doll." he said, his voice low and raspy from sleep.

"Can we try again today ?" I asked slowly.

"We absolutely can, doll. But let's have breakfast first." he scratched his growing beard.

"And doll ?" he said his blue eyes traveled down my body.
"If you keep up teasing me like this.." gesturing to my lacy sheer bra, his gaze traveling down from the little diamond jewelry adorning my belly button to the waistband of my equally sheer panties.
"...I don't know how long I can resist not cuffing you to this bed and have my wicked way." he confessed, mischievous half-smile on his full lips.

"Dream on, soldier.'' I said, swinging my legs over edge of the bed, standing up and giving my ass a little shimmy.
Two can play this game, Barnes.

Barnes got up revealing the rest of his sleeping outfit, consisting of a grey pair of briefs.
Huh, I had pegged him for the plaid boxers kinda guy.
He padded to the kitchenette where he filled up the water tank of the coffee machine and poured some scoops of ground coffee. Watching his back muscles play while he did mundane tasks like this.

My mind was at war with my urge to touch the soft skin of his back, run my fingers through that mass of dark brown hair and kiss those soft lips.
Snap out of it, Brubaker. 

I bend over the floor to pick up the white shirt I wore yesterday and pulled it over my head.

"Tell me, doll. What are you gonna do once you are free?" he asked sliding a mug of steaming coffee in front of me.

Huh, I haven't thought about it yet.
I put my pointer finger to my lips.

"Well, Hydra has to be stopped, even if it's only temporarily." I said, taking a sip of the warm dark brown liquid remembering the words of Johan Schmidt.
"And there's one particular person I have unfinished business with." my thoughts circled around Brock Rumlow, feeling bile rise in my throat.

"So you wanna kill Alexander Pierce?" he asked. That seemed like it would put a short stop to Hydra at least a new head formed.

"Yes. I will never be free until he's gone." I said looking into my mug, pensive.

We finished the rest of the breakfast in silence.

My mood was gloomy, knowing what's to come next.

Barnes pulled the notebook and looked at me, waiting  for my approval to start another session. I nodded, balling my hands into fists.

And again same german words, causing  burning behind my eyes so I closed them, trying to stay strong and work through the pain.

The pain elevated into new levels.

I started thrashing and screaming, Barnes coming behind me, grabbing my arms and holding them behind my back  with his metal arm and with his other hand he stroked my hair.

With the last word he spoke, I slumped against him, exhausted.

I relaxed my muscles and felt Barnes loosen his grip on my wrists, lowering me onto his lap.

I let my head rest on his shoulder while he rubbed my back slowly.

My eyes stung, I felt tears coming on.

Letting out a small sob, I looked up at Barnes. Into those ocean blue eyes that brought me comfort, starting to feel like home.

"Shhh, just let it go, doll. I'm here to protect you." he whispered.

That's all it took for me.

Uncontrollable sobs left my body and warm tears ran down my face.