"if i
show my
fangs will
you tell
me that
they're cool?"
what is grief, if not love persevering
[book 2 in the Lilac Collins series]
[teen wolf seasons 3a, 3b & 4]
[slow burn🔥 - best friends to lovers ]
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'I'm not broken.'
Trust was something Lilac Collins wasn't at one with. She found it hard, hard to trust people that came into her life, it was an emotion she found herself struggling to accept. She didn't exactly understand how people gave trust away so easily, how they let people see the real them like it meant nothing at all. It was strange when she found somebody new gaining her trust, there was always a feeling she got that told her the people who wouldn't break it.
To her, breaking trust was like breaking her heart. It was metaphorical, that when a heart is broken once it would stay broken, no matter how many times a person fell in love, their first heartbreak would always remind them of their past and when somebody broke Lilacs trust, she would never forget how that person betrayed her, how they went against what she believed in and she wouldn't forgive them.
It was something she lived by, that the people she trusted most in her life also trusted her, it was an emotion that went both ways. She had had her trustbroken, she had told people things she didn't tell others and she had poured out her heart but there had been times in her life that Lilac found herself questioning herself, if she really could trust the people she would never have doubted. Maybe it was paranoia, or maybe she was right because sometimes people turn out to be somebody you would never expect.
Which was why she found herself questioning what she believed in right now. The way she felt she could give her trust to a girl she just met, that she would understand and not judge, that she would be someone for her to confide in. That person was Malia and Lilac couldn't exactly understand how she felt this way. She had punched her boyfriend, tried to punch her but still she found herself speaking with the girl as if they had been friends for years and in a way it made her feel whole. Like a part of her she was missing felt whole again. She felt like she had a sister in the short amount of time, one that filled the hole of her missing brother.
She didn't exactly know why she felt that way, if it was the way Malia followed her around like a lost puppy, or the way she asked questions like a child or how she really had no filter when she talked. It was as the time passed the girls found themselves becoming close friends, forming a bond and Stiles saw it too. He saw how the two smiled when they talked, how they seemed to connect almost instantly and it was strange for him to see his girlfriend trust her, to see her trust anybody that wasn't already in the pack. And he couldn't help but think it was because the two were rather similar, the way both Malia and Lilac saw themselves as monsters, ones that caused pain even if they were simply the victims in such horrific events.
He had never thought it was healthy how she had formed bonds, how she formed emotional connections with others simply based on her trauma, how she made jokes about things some people would find rather morbid but it had simply become her way of coping. He watched her bond with Isaac, the way the two connected so quickly was unlike her boyfriend had ever scene, she wasn't the most trusting person so to see the way she was with Isaac, it made him rather jealous. They had a sort of understanding between each other, the curly headed boy and the brunette girl shared traumas in their lives that brought them closer together and over time, Stiles began to realise how toxic that relationship could have been, how it was formed over emotional pain.
